Virgin // Shawn Mendes [Wattys 2018]

CHAPTER 28

Lexi's p.o.v

1 week later

Getting over Shawn has been so hard. I feel like I'll never get over him. I just want to see him. Hug him. Kiss him. Just tell him how much I need him in my life.

"Oh my god Lex you'll never believe who I just met!!!" Vale says snapping me out of my thoughts as she runs into my room.

"Who?"

"Austin Mahone. I went to my modeling agency to schedule an Instagram shoot and he was there at the counter. When I walked up behind him waiting to talk to the lady at the desk, he turned around and we bumped into eachother."

"Awe Vale that's perfect!!!"

"Its so weird. We had some connection. I can't explain it." Vale's happiness is everything to me. She deserves everything.

"I'm so happy for you Vale! So are you going to talk to him?"

"Um actually yes. We talked a little and he gave me his number!" She said jumping.

"Then what are you doing talking to me? Go text him" she laughs then walks out my room. I wish I was as happy as her.

I'm done with this guilt trip of me letting him let go of me. I jump up from my bed, go to my closet and pick out an outfit. I'm gonna take pictures for Instagram. Once I put my outfit together, I go to my vanity and put on my makeup. I do a rose gold smoky eye with my prolexx makeup pallet.

I need to promote it somehow since it just came out. Fans are loving it. Shawn liked the picture of me announcing the makeup line and commented "proud". I wish he would dm me but there's not much to talk about.

He left to be with his family then he goes back on tour, I left for this makeup line and any other potential modeling gigs. We ended on good terms but I haven't seen him since that night.

I think Vale was right. He hurt me more by doing what he did with me. He left marks on me so I would remember him. He said meaningful words that gave me hope that we'll be ok. But we aren't.

He hurt me. The break up wasn't mutual. We could have made it work. We could've texted and called everyday. But he didn't want to fight for us. He wanted me out of his mind so he wouldn't miss me so much.

I would think about him a lot less if we were still together, but I just imagine what he would say if he were with me. How he would react to things. He let me go. He said he would never let me go, but he did. I loved him so much.

I was willing to fight for us, but he wasn't. That means that I loved him way more than he loved me.