A Happy Ending (Shannon and Cammie)

Chapter 10

Cammie POV

I think my favorite thing about Shannon is how different she is. Nothing is predictable with her. I never would have predicted that I'd even become friends with the girl I knocked over with a giant cardboard box on move in day. So I really didn't expect to be kissing her in IHOP at 2 in the morning after agreeing to be her girlfriend. But life's funny that way, you know? You meet the most amazing people in the most unexpected ways. 

"Earth to Cammie," she snapped her fingers in front of my face. I came to and realized I had zoned out for a minute. She chuckled, "were you picturing me naked again? Cammie, come on. Not while we're in public," she teased. 

"You're such a jerk," I pushed her shoulder. "I was just thinking about how I'm going to find a new girlfriend." I stuck my tongue out at her. 

Her jaw dropped, "you wouldn't!!" She pretended to be heartbroken, "we've only been together for two weeks and you already want to leave me out in the cold, huh? Rude." 

I laughed playfully, "I kid, babe." I reached up and gave her a kiss on the cheek. 

She smiled and kept pushing the grocery cart. No wonder I had zoned out, we had been standing in the same spot for at least 5 minutes while Shannon examined what kind of soup she wanted to get. 

We left the grocery store after what felt like hours because Shannon is literally the most difficult person to shop with. We were in her car on the way back, stopped at a red light. 

She cleared her throat, "so, um, this weekend. Do you have any plans?" She sounded nervous about asking me, she never sounds nervous asking me to hang out. 

"No, not that I can think of. Why, what's up?" I asked curiously. 

"Well, I- my dad is coming to town and he uh- he wants to meet you I guess," she wouldn't look at me the whole time she spoke. 

I chuckled a bit, "Shan what are you so nervous about? I'd love to meet him."

She looked at me warningly, "don't be so sure, Cam. My dad has never been super supportive of me being who I am. I've never had a serious enough girlfriend to introduce him to until now, so when he found out about you he insisted we meet." 

I felt bad for her after she explained it. I never really had trouble with that, both of my parents were supportive of me being gay. "Shan it will be okay, I promise. If you want me to meet him, I would love to," I tried to reassure her that no matter what her dad thought, everything would be fine. 

She gave me a sad smile, "of course I want you to meet him, I just want you to know what to expect. If he is rude, I don't want you to take what he says personally, okay? It's not you he has a problem with." 

I grabbed her hand and leaned up to kiss her cheek. "Don't worry, baby," I whispered and planted another kiss on her cheek. I felt her smile a bit when I did. 

After a short pause, I broke the silence. "So we're serious?" I said a bit jokingly but with a huge grin on my face. 

"What?" She laughed, not realizing what I meant. 

I giggled, "You said you hadn't had a serious girlfriend until now." 

She blushed a little bit, which was rare. Usually it was her who made me blush. "I mean it. I've never cared about building something with someone. Everyone else always made it seem like a waste of time. Everyone but you." 

It melted my heart that Shan was so open about how she felt about me, without me having to say anything. Any other relationship I had been in never went that way. They would always want to know how I felt before spilling their feelings everywhere, because if I didn't feel the same way they didn't want to look like an idiot. "You make me happy, Shannon. Like really happy," I said, smiling at her like a dork. 

She brought my hand to her lips and kissed it. "Good, because you make me like really happy too." 

We got back to the apartment and I helped Shannon with her groceries. It was mid evening on a Sunday. I'd spent a lot of time with her lately, but I still couldn't bring myself to explain why I stopped her that night. Nothing like that had even come close to happening again, so there was nothing to prompt the conversation. I felt bad, though, because I know she has wanted to ask me to stay with her, but she doesn't want to overstep. She has no idea what made me say no, so as far as she's concerned, I could just not want to have sex with her. 

"Stay with me tonight," I said out of nowhere while we sat on the couch watching TV. 

She tried to hide her smile, "really?" 

"What do you mean 'really'? Of course, you goof," I giggled. 

She could hardly contain her excitement. We hadn't ever actually stayed the night together, despite living 20 feet from one another. The only time we slept in the same bed was the night we were drunk. 

We made our way over to my place when it got a little later. Shan sat on my bed as I did my nightly routine in the bathroom. I came out and she was all tucked in bed. "Your bed is so cozy," she smiled, all snuggled up in the blanket. 

I climbed in next to her and got comfortable. She rolled onto her side to face me, and I did the same. She gave me a soft kiss and brushed my hair behind my ear. "You know, Cam. We don't have to do anything. I could kiss you forever and never need anything more," she said quietly, gazing into my eyes. 

I nodded and took a deep breath. It was time to tell her, even if I never wanted to speak of it again. "I think I'm ready to talk to you about that, about why I stopped you that night," I began. 

She sat up and I did, too. "Okay, but you don't have to if you don't want to. I'm not going to push you or anything," she reminded me. 

"I know, but you should know," I sighed and looked off into the distance for a moment. She grabbed my hand and held it softly in hers, stroking her thumb along mine. "We haven't talked much about our past relationships, but mine didn't end so well. In fact, the whole relationship was just a mess. It was my first real relationship with a girl, and honestly, I had no clue what I was doing. She was a little older than me and she just made me feel like she owned me, you know?" I paused for a moment. I realized I hadn't been looking at her while I was talking, I had just been staring into my lap. I glanced at her and she was listening intently. "I guess I just let myself believe that it was okay for her to make me feel like that, but eventually it got to the point where she controlled everything I did, but I couldn't dictate anything on her end. She would sleep around with other people and things like that. Anyway, we had had sex a few times before we ever really became serious and it was fine, but once she started becoming control she made me feel like I owed it to her." I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. 

I looked at her and she realized that I was on the verge of crying. "Oh, baby, come here," she pulled my into her chest. 

I gathered myself long enough to finish what I needed to say. "She had manipulated me into believing these things were okay, so for a long time I did. But one night, we had gotten into a fight and- and she came into the bedroom and pinned me against the wall. I thought for sure things were going to get physical, but all she wanted was sex. That's how she always wanted to make up. This time, though, I didn't let her. I pushed her off of me and she immediately grew angry and threw me on the bed. I had never felt more helpless than in that moment, and every time she had done that to me. I just- I never want to feel that way again." I couldn't even speak at this point. Tears streamed down my face just reliving that night, and that entire relationship. 

I looked at Shannon, whose eyes were glossed over. She blinked and let a tear fall, "I am so sorry, Cammie." She just held me for a few minutes while I sobbed into her chest. When I could finally steady my breathing, she spoke again. "Cam, listen to me. This is your body. I'm never going to take that from you, and no one else should either. I never want you to think that I only want sex from you. From the moment I looked into those green eyes, that was never my intention. I want you for all the goofy jokes and the playful fights and the sleepy kisses. I don't need sex to make me happy, I just need you." 

"Shan," I tried to speak but my emotions were all over the place. Her words had made me want to cry happy tears for having found someone so amazing, "I wish I would have found you three years ago."