Put flowers on the desk. (Soonhoon)

Day 29.

I woke up in excruciating pain.

I opened my eyes to a pitch black room which unsettled me.

I was afraid.

I wanted to know where Soonyoung was.

I needed him.

After a moment I weakly sat up, until I heard a soft "Jihoonie, lay back down."

I looked to my left and saw Soonyoung there, sitting in the chair with a concerned look on his face, mixed with relief.

I let out a weak, shaky breath and did what he told me. I lifted my hand for him to hold.

I saw him hesitate.

But then he laced our fingers a mere minute afterwards. "I was so worried.." he whispered.

I blinked and then spoke. "What happened?" My throat was dry and muffled from the breathing mask that was now on me again.

"I don't know, they didn't tell me." He smiled sadly. "I'm sure it's because we took you off the machines.."

He paused.

"I'm sorry." He said quietly.

He held my hand to his forehead. "It's my fault.. I'm so sorry."

I felt something wet hit my fingertips and I realized it was his tears.

"I made you worse.. I'm sorry."

He hiccuped and I felt his hands shake.

"D-Don't say sorry.." I let out. "Please don't."

He shook his head and didn't listen. He ran his thumb over my hand in circles.

"You shouldn't have left.. I'm so sorry.." His broken voice sent panic through my body.

All that ran through my head was panic.

I didn't know what to do.

"Please.." I spoke with my dry voice. "Stop crying.. I'll do anything.. just please don't cry.."

I held onto him tighter. "It wasn't your fault.. I wanted to go. I made you take me- it's not your fault. I'm okay, see?"

I tried in hopes to make him calm. After a while he kissed my hand so softly.

"I'm not even supposed to be touching you.." he whispered over my fingers. "They told me I can't.."

"I don't c-care about them." I said to him. "I only care about you."

He didn't say anything for a long time.

He shakily let go of my hand and wiped his face. He didn't say anything.

Meanwhile I was getting frustrated.

I wanted to focus on him- only him, but the mask was too tight on my face. I didn't like having air blown inside of me.

And I didn't know how to help him.

I decided I didn't want the annoying mask on me anymore.

Even though it hurt, I moved and lifted it off my face.

"Don't take it off," he stopped me. "You're not supposed to."

"I'm okay." I said softly.

"Please for me, leave it on.." Why was he so concerned about me?

He slowly got up and reached to help me put it on my face.

That's when I noticed red staining his hoodie sleeve.

I immediately paused and stopped him. "W-Whats that?" I held his arm still and he winced in pain.

"Nothing." He said in a soft tone. "Don't worry about me, let me help you-"

"Please show me." I said.

My mask was back on my face and he sat back down.

After a while he slowly rolled up his sleeve with an expression of nothing.

His left arm was irritated red.

There was a deep gash in his arm and a small square of raw skin around it. He was bleeding.

A small drop of blood instantly rolled down his arm to which he immediately put his hand under.

Even though he told me not to sit up, I did anyway.

"Oh my god, what happened?" My voice was in panic and I went to see.

He winced and rolled his sleeve back down on it, pressing down.

"The nurse didn't know my IV was connected to the wheelchair and she yanked the wire out of me."

"Why is it still bleeding?"

"I didn't tell her."

I felt like crying from seeing him hurt.

"Why didn't you tell them?"

"I had to make sure you were okay. I couldn't leave you like that."

"Yes you could've." My voice broke as I spoke and tears felt like they could spill from my eyes.

Before they had the chance do Soonyoung came up and kissed my lips. "I'm okay." He said.

He placed kisses on my lips over and over again then on my cheeks.

He kissed the corners of my eyes and with every kiss moved to my nose.

"Don't cry."

"I-I won't.." I hesitantly whispered. "B-But please tell someone."

He kissed my nose a final time and looked at me. "I promise."