Something to gain #37

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It's been a long time since then
I've been longing from you since that night
That every night I have to dream about you
And in the following morning I have to cry
Because I miss you
The next day I have to dry up my tears and remember you never been missed me
Think that I have to look on someone and act like I didn't miss you
Be with someone and make you jealous
Every time that happens,
I was the one who is surprised
I was the one who is jealous
I hurt myself by seeing you happy with her
How you talk about many things
All we do was little chitchat
I fucking hate it
That I have to make it to the point that I can't let you go
That all I want is to hold unto you
Was to have 'us'
But these things brought sadness
Another day of sadness, where I have to endure all the pain
And have something to gain
Not with you.
But maybe with myself.

// I just don't love you no more ~

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