Chapter 1: smile

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Town streets were unusually peaceful. The only sources of sound were buckets of rain coming down to the pavement and my footsteps. It was almost midnight. Street lights were poor and barely any help.

Although I couldn't really see anything as my eyes were filled with tears, I ran. I had no idea where to, but I still ran. I felt useless.

-flashback-

That was the one time I truly needed comfort.

"Mom... I need you"

I couldn't remember the last time I felt happy or loved.

"Can't you see your mother is tired, disrespectful selfish child!" I was interrupted by my stepfather who was sitting on the couch while holding my mom. "All you ever do is seek for attention like the whole world revolves around you, you should..." I didn't let him finish. "What?! How dare you even say that? Ever since you stepped into our life I've been a total nothing! You basically took my mother away from me and you dare say I'm selfish??"

I could have kept ranting forever, but I was shut down by a loud slap across my face. A tear ran down my cheek that now felt like it was on fire.

I turned my head, but not to him. To my mom. She didn't look. She didn't do anything. I could see her frown slightly. There was a pinch of disappointment in her face. Was she really let down by me? I couldn't believe it. That bastard changed her. She wasn't my mother anymore... I was just a waste of her space now. A mistake.

I looked the fucker right in the eyes. He was tall and quite masculine, but all that was ruined by the beer belly and a pedophile mustache. He turned around and started walking back to the couch. I had the urge... to do something really bad. But even if I had the courage to do so, I wouldn't. Although my mother didn't care for me anymore, I still cared for her. And she loved him... 

I acted on impulse and as I was about to leave the apartment I heard her silent mellow voice
"(Y/N)..." my heart stopped for a second. She cares. "Perhaps it's better for all of us if you get a job and move out. Your 17 after all. You need to learn to take care of yourself."  She doesn't care. Fine. You want me to leave. I'll leave. So I did, slamming the front door as hard as I could.

I ran past the elevator, which I always avoided, and down the stairs. It didn't take long for my clothes to completely soak in rain as I stepped outside.

-flashback end-

Lights in the area I was in now were dim and it got darker with each block I passed.

The pain and anger took my mind away from the fact that I was freezing by now. It was the middle of October and the only thing that kept me warm was my older brothers denim jacket. The only thing I had left of him.

Rain was as strong as ever. It was starting to get harder to keep my eyes open. I searched for a roof of some kind and suddenly I heard someone, but no one was around. Was it my imagination?

As I was looking for the possible danger my eyes stumbled upon a dirty metal door that was slightly open. Of course, being the smart-ass that I am I peeked inside without thinking much. There was a dark hallway that lead into haunt of some kind as I could hear heavy metal. I walked deeper inside and it got louder.

Without realizing I was suddenly emerged in a crowd of people. Everyone was either drunk or high. They were all alternatives. Unaccepted by the society, pretty much like myself. The music was blasting into my ears. It was extremely loud. I could see a blue light covered stage with 4 edgy looking guys on it playing their instruments. Some people were calmly rocking out, others went all out and banged their crazy colored heads.

Looking around I saw a a circle of people. They were smoking weed. I didn't know what was I doing, but I needed to get away just this once. Without asking for anyone's permission I stepped in and took the blunt. The guy next to me looked a little confused, but he didn't refuse to give it to me. After a couple of circles I was already spacing out. The world became beautiful for the first time in a while. I saw some flowers flying around the room and tried to catch one.

While on my quest I nearly knocked into a guy. I looked up. His face was hidden by a hood. But I noticed his smile. It was the widest smile I had ever seen.

"What a lovely smile" I said as I chuckled.

He grinned at me even wider if that was even possible and within the blink on an eye disappeared among people. That made me frown. I tried to look for him in the crowd. Unsuccessfully. Eventually I forgot all about him since all that was on my mind was that weird mole a guy in front of me had right on his left cheek.

The night went on and I actually had fun for once. That was soon ruined by a woman's scream. Everyone ran towards it. So did I. The sight was appalling. In the middle of the crowd was a corpse of a woman. Someone had stabbed her all over the stomach and chest multiple times. And one thing that caught everyone's attention was the smile carved on her face.

"Like it?" I heard someone's deep rusty voice right next to my ear. But when I looked behind no one was next to me that could have said that. I looked back at the dead woman that now permanently had a smile. Did I like it?

As people were running around in fear and calling the police I just felt dizzy. My mind wasn't functioning fully. Everything went into a haze and I blacked out.

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