Desire 2

Chapter Forty-Two

After about ten minutes of pouring my heart out, we fixed the elevator and headed back to our suite. I carried Cam in, her legs suddenly given out in the elevator. She was warm in my arms and I felt her heartbeat on my chest, her soft hair fall on my arm. 

"I'm gonna take Destiny to my room," Robert stated, Destiny laying lifeless in his arms. 

"I'm gonna take Cam to mine," I added, as Zach nodded at me in agreement. 

I carried her into my room, a light brown color on the walls, the sheets already pulled down. I lay her down flat on the bed as I untied the straps from her heels and tossed them on the floor. 

"No," she sighed, the simple word tearing my heart into shreads at the thought of what could've happened tonight. 

"Hey," I spoke, sitting her up to face me, "Hey, it's me," 

She bat her eyes at me and opened her mouth to speak, "Austin?" 

"Yeah," I laughed, "It's Austin," 

"I'm confused," she spoke innocently.

"Yeah, I bet you are," I began, "It's okay though. You're safe. I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you," 

She smiled before running her fingers through her hair, "I wanna get out of this dress," 

I laughed at her bluntness before pulling her up to stand in front of me. I moved towards my suitcase, pulling out an old t-shirt and pair of basketball shorts. 

"Here," I smiled, moving her to the bathroom before she stepped in the doorway. 

Just then, a sickened look came across her face and she fell to the ground, reaching for the toliet. She threw her hands around the sides and suddenly I realized why she had look so disgusted. I fell down on the floor beside her, pulling her hair out of her face and grippping it in my hands. I sat, watching her, knowing that there was nothing I could do to help her or make her feel any better, which hurt more than anything. I lay my head softly on her back, placing kisses on her upper back as she finally seemed to stop throwing up. 

"Oh my God," she let out, "I feel so sick," 

"Here," I began, "I'll help you get dressed," 

She stood, her head bobbing back and forth, I made my way behind her, unzipping the back of her dress and pushing it off her body. Her skin was warm as I removed her dress. My hands trailed over her ribs and further reached her thighs and down onto her feet. 

I already wanted more than anything to kiss her. I wanted to kiss her everywhere and hold her body against mine and being this close to her made me want her even more. But I didn't want her like this. I wasn't going to take advantage of her vulnerable state. I wouldn't. 

I grabbed my shirt of the counter as I traveled to the other side of her, her eyes suprisingly wide. I wrapped my hands around the head hole of the shirt and pushed it over her head as I felt her hands grip my waist for stability, taking me by suprise and sending electricity shooting through my body. She pushed her arms through the other holes as I pulled the shirt down over her chest, my hands brushing the sides of her bra and over her stomach, stopping at her waist. 

"Here," I added, gripping the shorts in my hands, "Hold onto my shoulders," 

She placed her feet in the shorts as I pulled them up to meet the shirt at her waist. I stood, our faces inches apart. I want to kiss her but I can't. I can't kiss her right now. Not like this.

"Come on. Let's get you to bed," I began,

"Austin," she started. 

"Yeah?" 

"When you left," she slurred, "did you break down too? Because I was a mess. I actually,  watched nothing but Crazy Stupid Love for like a month straight because it reminded me of you. Did you feel that way or was it easy for you?"

"It was pure hell," I spoke after a moment of thought. 

She smiled at the words, "Good. I don't feel so alone now," 

I gave her a sincere look, before gripping her face with one hand and pushing another through her hair, "You're never alone, You hear me?" 

She nodded, her head falling on my shoulder and her hands wrapping around my back as I wrapped mine around the back of her head. I held her for a while, for what seemed like an eternity. I pushed my lips onto her forehead as she looked up to face me. 

"I miss you," she let out. 

"I love you," I added, suddenly breathless. 

"I wanna go to sleep," she replied, her eyes becoming heavy.

I smiled at her, "Come on," 

I led her to the bed and pulled the sheets down more as she crawled in. I threw the blankets atop of her as she nestled up next to the pillow beside her. I began towards the door as I felt a tug at my hand and looked back to see Cam's hand wrapped with mine. 

"Stay with me," she pleaded, her hand still interlocked with mine. 

"I don't know if that's such a good id-" 

"Please? Just until I fall asleep? Please?" she begged, her grip on my hand tightening. 

I took a deep breath before sliding in bed beside her. Her body was warm and her skin was soft. I pulled the shirt off of my torso and threw it on the ground beside me as she watched me. I lay down beside her, our bodies seperated until she nestled up beside me and threw her leg over one of mine. Her head was flat against my chest. I moved my hand up her back and to the back of her head, gripping onto her hair and kissing her temple. I needed this. I needed her again. This feeling with her was what I longed for. All this time I had been gone I was looking for something that could make me feel the happiness I did when I was with her.  All this time, I was looking for something that didn't exist, because she was my happiness. Fully and wholy. She was my happiness.