Renounce

Chapter 19

I sat at my favorite spot in the meadow facing the lake. My mind is nothing but blank and my heart, void. I hate everything in me. Maybe I wasn't beautiful enough for him, maybe not smart enough. Whatever the reason, he chose his mate. I'm not ready to accept that she was his destined mate because I am and am sure about it. He's just ignoring the signs.

The girl who comes to talk with me, is also not present today. I have no one who can understand me, no one to talk to. I'm alone as always. The air surrounding me, was still, giving me the atmosphere to grieve, I came to the meadow in anticipation to grieve, to shout, to cry but nothing was happening. I no longer feeling backstabbed. I guess my body and soul came to accept that.

I am so wrong,this isn't me. I never was like this. How can I act so stupid. No one messes with their mates. I'm so much infatuated with him that I made myself believe that I am his mate. What a fool. I have my own mate out there. How can I do such a thing. I vow to myself, I'll stop this craziness right now, right here.

Whatever attraction it is, I'll fight it. I'll make myself strong. I take this pledge. I'll do everything I can to keep my kingdom, my people and my loved ones safe. I'll secure a rank in the court of the kingdom.

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Five months later

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I could never imagined my life to come to this stage that I would willing participate in violence. After Harry's confession and my decision to have nothing but professional feelings for him, I focused completing on my training and improving my powers. It was difficult at first, practically impossible to adhere on my decision. Having to see Harry on a daily basis did impact me, but after the day Serene was marked and mated to him, something inside me changed. I became a hollow lifeless shell with no feelings intact. This made easy for me to proceed further. I do care about Drake and my family, but no feeling other than that.

During training many other supernatural beings visited us, but I didn't find my mate. Entire unmated wolves of my pack found their mates apart from two, one being me and other, Suong. Suong is a strong warrior werewolf, who happened to be my mother's distant cousin. His mate died soon after he marked and mated with her. That caused him to be in a state worse than mine.

Well for Severs, the effort and time they put in training was outstanding. It's like they knew they have to be number one this time and practiced vigorously and for his King, finding a mate would change a person,but he was changed, only for the worse. He became colder than before. His eyes only softened for his mate, Serene. Drake mentioned that his King became a cold-hearted person, it didn't affect me as much as it should, maybe a good sign.

The day of choosing the council members for the court of the kingdom has come. Everyone has to fight for the council posts being, Beta and Gamma to the throne apart from the advisory council. Advisory council is nothing but a group of people representing their race to put forward their problems to the throne. Advisory council members in short will be the alpha's of their respective race.

I had participated for that advisory member position. I had represented Sorcerers. Everyone who had even a cell of magic in them, be it a white magic or dark, fall under my jurisdiction.

To even get nominated to such a post was difficult for me as I had only fire element in me. But I used my fighting skills along with my powers effectively and led me to this position.

The fights weren't easy, I lost my right earlobe when I angered a dark witch very badly during the fight. I can call a hole, as the only evidence of ever having a right ear. Though healers are working on my ear and trying to help it grow still, it's very awkward to have a hole instead of pinna and earlobe. I also lost my left little finger in fight with a dragon sorcerer. But there was always a fire in me to achieve the position that these hurdles never stopped me. My parents could no longer recognize as to what I became but nevertheless, they love me.