Wonders of Being Me (Luke Hemmings)

Chapter Sixteen: Still Friends

I literally sat through the rest of my classes, trying to figure out exactly what I was going to say to Ashton. I really hoped he would understand that I just don't like him like that.

I sat there, in Health, trying to figure out what in the hell I was going to say to Ashton. Maybe I can start by saying that we were just too close of friends and even if I did have any feelings for him, I wouldn't chance our friendship.

All I now is that I really didn't want to lose Ashton as a friend, besides Taylor and possibly Maddy, he was the only one I got.

The bell rings, signalling that class was over and to prepare yourself for the next one. I gather my materials and head for my locker.

I grab the necessary items for my next class and head down the hall to go to Earth Science.

I walk in and see a familiar face, Maddy. I look around for Taylor, making sure she didn't ditch class to make out with our teacher. Soon enough, she walks in, a smile on her face as she approaches Liam's desk.

They whisper to each other, probably something that couples would say and she comes over to join me at my seat.

"Have you talked to Ashton?" She asks me barely above a whisper. She sits in the seat next to me while Maddy sits on the other side.

"Not yet, I'm still trying to figure out what exactly I need to say to him." I whisper back.

She nods her head before turning her full attention back on Liam as he approaches the front of the class.

"Alright class, let's begin by..."

I literally drown his voice out to think about what was about to happen between Ashton and I. I really didn't feel like losing a best friend but I didn't want him to think that I had feelings for him in that sense.

I just, I wish I liked him instead of Luke. It would be a whole lot less complicated and I wouldn't even have to worry about Ashton not loving me.

Luke is hot, to put it simply, he could have anyone he wanted but I was starting to wonder why he chose me. I am not that pretty or skinny, he even fucking called me names to prove it! I just think that Sarah chick might come around and ruin everything.

I really don't want to fall for someone unfaithful, I refuse to let that happen.

--

I sit on his bed, not ready to fully start this awkward conversation.

"So you wanted to talk?" He asks me and I smile nervously.

I nod my head and he joins me on the bed, making me shift so I can face him directly.

"Can I start it? Just let me say what I have to say, I won't hold back and neither will you. Okay?"

He nods his head and I take a deep breath before beginning.

"Ashton, I love you." I say and he smiles, joy filled his eyes.

"I just don't love you the way you think you love me."

His eyes softens, loosing the joy and the smile that used to be there.

"Are you sure you love me Ashton?" I ask him, maybe he was confused of his own feelings. Maybe it was just lust and he didn't really know what it was.

"I-I don't know. Maybe. No. Yes. I think so." He says and avoids my eye contact.

"Look," I say and grab his hand, cupping it with my own, "I love you Ashton, as a friend. Even if I did have those type of feelings for you, I would never chance them on something like this."

He smiles, "Maybe I love you. I care about you but as I think of it," he pauses and shakes his head, "I honestly think it was just lust."

I sigh. "I want us to be friends and I'm glad you care about me but we can't be nothing more than friends. Are you okay with this?"

"Yes Hazel, I love you."

I give him a weird look and he catches himself, "As a friend. Anyways," he pulls his hand from me, "what's up with Maddy, she's gorgeous."

I smile at Ashton, realizing that we could still be friends after all.

(Here is just a filler chapter! Next update is 340 views and 46 votes! Thanks so much for all the reads and votes! Be sure to comment so I can update faster! :))