Meredith And Nathan: fight for your L(ife)ove

Does he know?

The next morning:
-So Amelia, have you thought about it?
-bout what?
-You know, the turkey we will cook on thanksgiving. The freaking baby Amelia!!
-what's with the baby?
-You need to tell Owen as soon as possible
-Shhh, Meredith.
-What? He isn't even here
-I know but Maggie is. Don't be too loud, or else she'll hear. Maggie doesn't have to know, at least not before Owen knows.
-Before Owen knows what?- a male voice said
-Owen, what are you doing here? I thought you were staying at home.
-I came here to see if you needed anything. Amelia, is there anything you'd like to tell me?
-I'm pregnant, Owen. And I'm too freaking scared to even be happy about it. I know you want this, and maybe I do too, but I'm really scared and I need some time. Ok? Now if you'll excuse me, I need some fresh air.-and she left the house to the porch.
-Meredith, how long has she known?
-She knew she was late, and so did you so don't pretend this is a huge surprise. Where were you when she needed you? Because I might have been in a hospital room for a couple of days, but let me be very clear Owen, I know my sister. I know she is not okay. And I know that's partly because you aren't helping much. If you really want this kid, prove it. You have pushed Cristina to have a baby, and now that Amelia is giving you that, you are wasting it. Don't blow this.
-Meredith what the hell? I love Amelia, I wanna have this kid with her. But you think I'm not scared?
-Who's the one that already had a baby and turned out to have no brain?
-I know but still, do you think It wouldn't hurt me too?
-I'm not saying that. I'm just telling you to be careful. Are you scared? multiply that by a hundred for her.
Just as I say this, he stands there, looking at me, and after a few seconds he leaves. He seems a little angry, but I don't really care about him. I care about Amelia:
-Mer, what did you tell him?
-I was only giving some parental advice. Shall we go to the hospital for my follow up?
-Sure let's go.

At the hospital...
-Dr. Grey! We need you-an intern shouted- a trauma came in and there are no attendings whatsoever.
-Helm, I'm not on my shift. I came here for a follow up.
-Please, Dr. Grey, we need you. There are literally no attendings in the pit, they all left or are in other surgeries.
-Ok, I'll help. What do we have?
-30 year old female, three broken ribs, rigid abdomen, broken knee. We should get her up for CT just in case.
-But there's no evidence of brain damage, she isn't even bleeding. So in that case let's page cardio and tell the OR floor we're on our way.
-Right away, Dr. Grey.
-Also, wait. Amelia!!-she came running down to where I was.
-What is it?
-I need you to check for possible brain damage. We can't get her up for a CT because we need to open her abdomen asap.
-Ok let's see. Shoot. There is a scar above her neck, bleeding pretty badly. We should go to CT first. Let's move!
......
-Here, you see? She has a subarachnoid hemorrhage. We need to open her up.  Now the hemorrhage isn't that bad, she could last up to five hours with it. So here's the plan: in the mean time, you'll repair her abdomen. You have within these five hours. No more. When you are done I'll scrub in and operate on her brain.
-Ok good plan. Let's get her to the OR now.
........
-Bohkee, glove me.
-Mer, are you sure you can do this surgery? Nathan told you not to fatigue.
-Amelia I have to do it. There are no surgeons today.
As soon as I finish saying that, Nathan enters the OR
-What the hell is this?! Meredith, get out of this OR right now!
-There aren't any surgeons left, so I need to do this.
-Meredith, you just had surgery on yourself, you mustn't be here.
-Look Nathan, I came here for my follow up, Helma asked for help and I had to do it. And if you are not gonna support me, feel free to leave this OR.
He left furiously
——————
It's three p.m and I am so hungry I could kill for food. I go to the cafeteria, and see Nathan eating on his own. He looks so angry, I really screwed up today. Anyway, I go towards him and say:
-May I sit with you Dr. Riggs?
-Whatever. I was about to leave for the pit.
-Nathan, wait. I'm so sorry for what happened, but I needed to save that life. Nathan, don't be mad at me for doing that.
-I am mad and I will continue to be mad if necessary.
-So was I supposed to let her die? Come on. What would you have done?
-I don't know, maybe call a damn attending!
-There weren't any attendings. It would have been too late for her. Are you really gonna stay mad at me?
-Yes.
-So this means you're cancelling tonight's plans...
-I don't know.
-Now you're the one being the jerk.
-Excuse me?
-April told me not to screw it up with you. But now I'm not being the jerk, you are. But forget it, I'm used to doing this. Believing it's all my fault, blaming it all on me. It won't hurt much to do it one more time.
-Meredith, wait
-No Nathan, I'm not waiting. For anyone again.

Stupid stupid me. What was I thinking? I try to apologize and instead stupid words come out of my mouth. I don't even mean them, they just come out. I try to tell him how much I love him, but I can't. Does he know I love him? I don't know. But it was too late now to look back.