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Chapter 39

I woke up in my own bed, in my own house.  That was weird.  The last thing I remember is Rye telling me I was his sister and I ran out of the venue the show was in and then I could see darkness and I didn't know where I was. 

I tried to get up but I feel someone gripping onto my waist, I turn over to see it's Andy.  I smile and then get up as quietly as I can.  I don't want to wake andy up otherwise he'll ask questions about why I'm up at 3 am in the morning.  The truth is, I'm going to LA.  I got a job in modelling a few weeks ago but I didn't want to tell the boys, I'm scared as to what they will think.  The only people who know I'm going for this job is my mum, Blair and Sophie.  My mum has offered to drive me to the airport so we can spend some time together before I leave for 2 months.  I quickly get changed into one of Andy's hoodies and some leggings and I brush my hair, and then after I put it into a ponytail.  It was a 15 hour flight so I dont want to wear any makeup.  I take my suitcase downstairs to see my mum already down there.  I go and hug her and then go into the kitchen to make breakfast.  I just get some cereal as I can eat on the plane.  I've already had £400 changed into dollars, so I have $542.  I'm gonna get a lot of money from the modelling aswell so I should be fine.  I'm staying with my auntie who I haven't seen in 3 years so it should be nice.

It's almost time to leave so I quickly grab a piece of paper and a pen and write a note to Andy and the boys.

'Andy, please don't get upset. I'm going to LA to start a career in modelling and further my career in singing.  I'm staying with my auntie for 2 months and I'll be back soon.  I love you so much, miss you already x'

It breaks me having to leave him like this.  He won't even be able to get in touch for 15 hours whilst I'm on the plane.  The main thing I'm worried about is what if a long distance relationship doesn't work out? What if he finds someone better than me, I mean, it isn't exactly hard.  I try not to think about it and then I put some trainers on, grab my suitcase and follow my mum outside.  We get into the car and drive to the airport. We sit in silence, but it's not an awkward one, it's just nice.  When we get to the airport my mum walks with me all the way up to security.  We hug for about 5 minutes and then I have to go or else I'll miss my flight.  I try to hold back tears as I walk away from her.  I turn around and give her a small smile and she looks back at me reassuringly.  I go through all of security and then I have to sit and wait for about half an hour.  By this time, it's 8am so I decide to check my phone.  13new messages and 11 missed calls all from Andy.

Andy: Kenzie? If you get this please ring me x
Andy: Kenz, are you okay? xx
Andy: Kenzie please! Why've you left? Did I do something? xxx
Andy: please answer my calls x
Andy: your making me worried xx
Andy: why are you going to LA and didn't even say goodbye?! xx
Andy: Kenzie please, just answer x
Andy: of course I just want you to be happy but why did you go without saying goodbye?
Andy- come on Kenz, we are all worried x
Andy- as soon as you see this call me xx
Andy- please? xx
Andy- are you okay Kenzie? xx
Andy: 😔xx

I decide to quickly text him back before boarding the plane.

You: sorry Andy, was going through security.  I've been planning this for weeks now but it just broke me thinking about having to tell you, so I thought It'd be better this way.  Anyway, I've got to board the plane now.  Talk soon xx

I feel really bad for just leaving Andy, but I have to.  I'm not doing anything with my life really, unless touring counts.  I want to do something else and this trip to LA could really help my following grow and make me have a better career.  It's time to board the plane so I get up and que for about 5 minutes before I give the lady my ticket.  She smiles and hands it back to me so I know which seat I'm in.  I have first class as I'm not paying for the plane.  The modelling agent is.  I get to my seat and sit down and get comfy.  About 15 minutes later it's finally time to leave.  As the aeroplane gets higher and higher up into the sky, I drift off to sleep.

Andy's POV
She's going to LA? Doesn't even bother telling me, her boyfriend?! What if she finds some hot American guy who she likes more? What if she stays in LA and never comes back? I just wish she was here right now, I don't know what I'm going to do with out her.

I get up and go and show the boys the letter.  They all hug me and ask if im okay.  I say I'm fine, leaving the room trying to hold back tears.  We are leaving to go back to London today so I go back into Kenzie's room and start to pack all my things up.  About an hour later me and the boys were ready to go.  We thanked Kenzie's Mum for having us and then we go outside to see our taxi is already waiting for us.  We get it and ask for Manchester train station and then we drive in an awkward silence all the way there, none of us know what to say. 

We get to the train station and go to platform 4 and wait for our train.  When I come we get on it and we go and find some seats.  I sit on my own, with Mikey and Jack behind me and Rye and Brooklyn infront.  I feel a tear slide down my face.  I miss her so much already.  I go on Instagram and see that she posted a new picture.  She was stood in front of the plane, looking so so happy.  I like it but don't comment and then I turn my phone off.  I just wish she didn't go to LA.  I'll admit, I'm scared of loosing her to some American guy who's better than me.  I don't know what I'm gonna do without her.