Damaged

Part 35

Alyssa's PoV

Closing Christen's door behind I felt as if a weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. I have finally told her my whole truth, my family stuff and I admitted that I told Tobin about her past, and she isn't mad at me. Plus I have a feeling once her medicine kicks back in and she sleeps for a while she will be back to her normal happy self. So as I walked down the hallway I couldn't help but feel somewhat good about how I handled today, but I still felt like I am forgetting something. When I walked into the kitchen and I saw Tobin, I thought maybe she was the reason I was feeling a little off.

She was at the kitchen counter, with ingredients all over the place, multiple pots and pans on the stove going. She was stirring some sort of concoction in the pot so aggressively that it was going everywhere.

"Tobin, you stayed?" I questioned shocked. I thought for sure she would run away again after Christen told her to leave.

"I'm not going to just leave. Especially when she is like this and especially right now." She responded determinedly.

I nodded my head approvingly, thinking that if she hadn't run away again then maybe my talk with her really did some good. Moving towards the counter I sat down feeling like there was more she wanted to say.

"Is she okay?" she asked hesitantly without turning around to face me.

"She took her medicine and should be sleeping."

"But like is she okay? I didn't mean to make things worse. I just wanted to see if she is okay." She apologized still not choosing to meet my eyes.

"Tobin you didn't make things worse." I tried reassuring her.

"I don't need you lying to me I know I fucked up and obviously Christen wouldn't agree with you." She told me sternly, going back to storing aggressively.

"She's just scared Tobs," I explained and finally, she turned around to face me. She looked shocked then confused.

"Why would Christen be scared of me?" She questioned me timidly.

I took a moment to move around the counter to shut off the stove and pull Tobin onto the couch in the next room. Sitting her down next to me and putting my arm around her should before responding.

"She's scared of letting you see her like this. She isn't her normal self and I think she is afraid you won't love her if you saw her in this state."

"But that's ridiculous. I love everything about Christen, nothing could change that." She immediately countered my point.

"Of course you do Tobin, but think of Christen's experiences. Not many people in her life had loved her unconditionally, stuck around and been there for her when she needed and she hasn't had much opportunity to full trust, somebody, to be there for her, except for her mom."

"So you think she doesn't trust me fully?" She sighed out obviously frustrated with the thought.

"I don't know maybe not, maybe she does. All I know is she is being irrational right now because she doesn't have full control of her emotions and that you shouldn't take it personally."

"You're right. I'll just have to wait and have a real conversation with her when she is feeling better."

"That a girl." I complimented her maturity. Soon after though there was a buzzing in my pocket that interrupted our moment. I pulled it out of pocket and saw Ashlyn calling me and before I even heard her saying anything it hit me what day it is.

"Shit!" I exclaimed jumping off the couch, answering the phone, realizing the thing I had forgotten. "Ash dude I completely forgot I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, I figured you were still taking care of Christen, she wasn't looking the best when Ali and I were checking on her earlier."