Damaged

Part 36

Christen's PoV

As soon as I could feel myself waking up, I could feel the sun that was coming through my window hitting me right in my face, obviously, the reason for me waking up. I turned over trying to go back to sleep, but it was futile. So instead I slowly blinked my eyes opened and looked at the clock on the far wall. Blinking my eyes some more because I couldn't believe the actual time.

I had been asleep for multiple hours and while I wish I could sleep some more because I feel in my body that everything wasn't back to normal. I still felt like there is a weight on my chest but I know it's better already because I could feel my stomach growl and the thought of food didn't make me want to throw up. So I rolled out of bed changed my clothing into more comfy sweatpants and sweatshirt and head down the hallway.

Walking down the hallway and into the kitchen I realized two things. One there was one of my favorite smells coming from the oven, with a closer look I confirmed my suspicion. Inside the oven was my favorite food, my mom's Mac n cheese. I pulled it out of the oven scooping a big portion into my bowl and couldn't stand to wait any longer so I jumped up, sat on the counter, and raised a spoonful to mouth instantly groaning at the good taste in my mouth. It was so good that I managed to scarf it all down within a few minutes.

And putting the now empty bowl in the sink I realized the second thing. I was alone. Looking at the almost full casserole of Mac n cheese I couldn't help but wish there was someone here sharing it with me. Whether that was anyone of my friends that I now call family or and who I knew I really wish was here with me, my girlfriend. Although based on our last interaction I don't expect to be seeing her anytime soon and that thought brought the weight back to my chest.

I yelled at Tobin, who was just trying to help me. But it truly scared me when she showed up. I never wanted her to see me like that because that's not the girl she loves and what if she rethinks her love for me?

And it's as if my thoughts made her appear because there she was standing in the doorway wide-eyed and mouth open, in shock.

"Shit sorry." She sputtered out a quick apology, and quickly turning around and moving down the hallway. Not bearing to see her run away I called out to her.

"Wait.." my voice cracking, I cleared it and repeated it... "wait Tobs don't go."

She turned back around and walked into the kitchen hesitantly not really sure what to expect. "Ummm do you need something?" She asked me looking anywhere but at me.

"No..I umm...I just wanted to tell you that I am sorry about yelling at you earlier, I knew you just wanted to help and I'm glad you stayed." I confessed quietly wanting to solve the tension between us that I knew I was the cause of. This time it was me avoiding eye contact because I was afraid she wouldn't accept my apology.

"You don't have to apologize about that Christen. I'm the one who should be apologizing." She retorted quickly and somehow she was across the kitchen and grabbing my hand off the counter, tugging slightly which meant she wanted me to meet her eyes. "I'm sorry about earlier....about all of it...leaving without saying anything and barging into your room like that. I was just worried about you." She continued obviously trying to make me feel better.

"It's okay Tobs." I agreed right away not wanting her to believe that she had anything to be sorry for, but with one look into her eyes I could see the pain still in them and I know it was my fault. So I pulled my hand away from hers instead wrapping her into my arms hoping this helps get us back to normal.

She immediately wrapped my arms around my waist, and because I was still on the counter and it was slightly awkward I put my arms up on her shoulders and when I kissed the top of her head I felt her relax further into me and pull me closer to her And all my worries were gone for a second because nothing bad could happen when I'm in her arms.