Behind The Scenes Of Choni: A Madnessa Story [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 14

         [VANESSA'S POV]
I wake up with Madelaine next to me. She's still asleep which is good. She hasn't slept good in weeks. I can tell. I lay there for a moment looking at her features before she starts turning. She stretches and lets out a small yawn. "Good morning, beautiful." I greet. "Morning." She replies with her raspy morning voice. "What do you want to do today?" I ask. She perks her lips for a second while thinking. "I really want to go to the gym. Then I need to read over the script for this weekend." Madelaine says. "Are you sure you can go to the gym? What if you hurt yourself more?" I ask worriedly. "I feel okay. My stomach isn't hurting anymore. Plus I haven't been to the gym lately and I really need to go." She states. "Okay but you need to take your medicine before you go." I say seriously. She nods and gets out of bed. She's wearing pajama pants. I thought she fell asleep wearing shorts. I ignore it and figure she probably got cold in the middle of the night. "Do you want to come with me?" She asks with a small smile. "Yeah, maybe I need to go to the gym too." I laugh. I follow Madelaine to the kitchen and grab her medicine. I give it to her and watch her drink it. She makes a disgusted face and I laugh at her. "It's gross." She pouts. "It's medicine." I laugh. She continues to pout so I kiss her lips softly. She smiles at that. "Come on. Let's get ready. I'll drive." I say smiling. She nods and leaves to get ready as do I.
[MADELAINE'S POV]
I had been at the gym for about thirty minutes now and I was doing my leg workouts. Vanessa gave up on working out and decided to watch me instead. I was almost done with my workout until my leg starts hurting a lot. I look at my thigh and see a wet spot on my leggings. Fuck. You didn't think to put bandages? I don't fucking have bandages. Well now you have to go clean yourself up. What's your girlfriend going to think? Ugh! I quickly stop my workout and go to the bathroom quickly. I grab a towel and wet it with water. I take of my leggings and wipe the blood away quickly. The door opens and Vanessa looks at me worried. I sit frozen. She looks at my thigh. "Madelaine," She says as tears fall down her cheeks. "Nessa, I can explain." I say quickly standing up but falling back down from the pain. I leave the towel over my thigh as I cry in pain. Vanessa walks over to me and sits next to me. She moves the towel carefully and looks at the open cuts. "Why?" She asks while crying. "I didn't want to. I really didn't please believe me." I beg. "If you didn't want to why did you?" She asks holding the towel on my thigh. "It wouldn't go away." I say sadly. "What wouldn't?" Vanessa asks confused. Don't do it. She's going to think you're crazy. She'll leave you. You don't want that now do you? I have to tell her. I look at Vanessa and she's looking at me with sad eyes. "The voice." I say almost inaudibly. I expect her to leave but she stays. "What does it say?" She asks nervously. "It tells me to do things. It tells me what other people might think and do. It told me to do this because I ate last night. Before we went to eat it told me not to." I say looking at my thigh. "It told me since I was already fat and I ate that I needed to be punished. I tried to ignore it but it was so loud, and you were asleep. I couldn't fall asleep. It would just yell. It wouldn't let me sleep until I did it." I say avoiding Vanessa's gaze. "You are not fat, okay. You are perfect. You need to eat because you have gotten so tiny lately. It's not the good tiny either. It's unhealthy. I need you healthy. If I'm asleep wake me up if you need me. If you are just awake and bored wake me up. I don't care what the reason is I will wake up if you need me." She moves the towel from over my thigh and touches the cuts lightly. They were so deep. I didn't even notice how deep they were until just now. "You should not do this to yourself. Nobody should. If you ever feel like you want to do this again you need to talk to me. I don't want you cutting yourself when you are so beautiful. I don't want you messing up your beautiful skin." Vanessa says softly. I can hear the shakiness in her voice. "This voice," Vanessa starts. She taps my forehead softly. "is lying to you. It's not someone you can trust. It's not someone you should listen to, okay? I want you safe, and this voice is putting you in danger." I nod my head. "I'm sorry." I apologize. "You don't need to be sorry. It's not your fault. You're trying your best to get better and I will be here along the way to help." Vanessa says reassuringly. "Thank you." I whisper. "How about we go home and get these cleaned up and bandaged?" She asks looking at my thigh. "Yes, please." I say. I stand up slowly. "Can you make it to the car?" Vanessa asks. I take a step with my other leg and then try with the cut leg. My leg gives out making me nearly fall to the ground but Vanessa catches me quickly. Instead of saying anything she lifts me up and carries me to the car. She buckles me in and gets into the drivers seat. "We don't have bandages at home." I say looking at my thigh. "That's okay. I can go run into the store real quick." Vanessa says sweetly. "So I have to stay here by myself?" I ask scared. "Are you okay with that?" She asks worriedly. It will give us some time to talk. Let her go. I shake my head sadly. "I don't want it to come back." I cry. Vanessa pulls over the car. She grabs my face and wipes away my tears carefully. "Hey, it's okay. I won't leave. We can go back home and postmate them or get Cami to get them. Which one do you want to do?" She asks. Postmate it they won't ask questions. Camila is going to judge you. She will hate you. Don't let her know. Don't trust it. Don't listen to it. "I want Cami to get them." I say shakily. You shouldn't ignore me. "Okay. Let's get home." Vanessa says kissing my head. She grabs her phone and calls Camila. "Hey, I need you to pick up some bandages for us if you can please." Vanessa begs. Vanessa looks at me before replying, "She can tell you when you bring them if she wants to." I look down disappointed in myself. "Thank you so much." Vanessa says hanging up the phone. She starts the car and drives home. Vanessa carries me inside and sets me on the bathroom counter. My cuts started bleeding more. Vanessa gets a towel and wets it slightly. She puts it on top of my thigh. "I'm going to put pressure on it to stop the bleeding, so this might hurt a little bit, okay?" Vanessa asks. I nod my head and Vanessa pushes on my thigh. I take in a sharp breath. "It's okay." Vanessa soothes. We both hear a knock at the door. "It's open." Vanessa yells. I hear the door open and close before seeing Camila at the doorway. "Mads, what happened?" Camila asks softly. She hands Vanessa the bandages. "Um..." I say quietly. Don't tell her. She will hate you. She doesn't need to know. Yes she does. No she doesn't. "I cut myself last night." I say quickly. "On accident or on purpose?" Camila asks worriedly. "On purpose." I say avoiding eye contact. "Why?" She asks stepping closer to me. "I don't want to talk about it but I promise I won't do it again." I say reassuringly. "Okay." She sighs. I look at my thigh and see that it has stop bleeding. "I'm going to run some water over it then after I dry it I will bandage it." Vanessa explains. Vanessa finishes bandaging my cut before carrying me to my bed. "I should probably get going." Camila says looking at her watch. "Are you sure? You can stay here. We can watch movies or run over the script?" I suggest. "You really want me to stay?" Camila asks surprised. "Yeah. I haven't hung out with you in a while. I miss you." I say sadly. "I miss you too." Camila smiles. "What shall we do, baby?" I ask Vanessa. "Whatever you want." Vanessa replies pecking my lips. "Can we watch movies?" I ask childishly. "Of course we can." She says lifting me up. I giggle and she kisses my head. She carries me to the living room and places me on the couch softly. "Let me make us some tea. Cami, can you and Mads pick a movie?" Vanessa asks going to the kitchen. Camila nods before finding a movie that we both like. She turns the tv on and starts the movie. Vanessa comes back with three cups. She hands one to me and one to Camila. She sits next to me and I cuddle into her side. "I love you." I whisper into her ear. "I love you too, babe." Vanessa says grabbing my hand and intertwining our fingers. She kisses my knuckles. "So much." She says against my skin.

Well this chapter is longer than I anticipated...... Hope you guys like it though. I have to get up in about four hours soooooo let's see if I can get some sleep lol. I will be stuck in the hospital "tomorrow" so I might update again then. Sorry if the chapter is bad I tried to make it as interesting as possible.

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