Queen

Chapter 16

"So, today wasn't... awful," Shawn said as he put away the guitar he was playing with earlier. I just scoffed.
"Thanks, I'll take that as a compliment." Not really offended I smiled at him.
"Hey, you uh... you want me to walk you to your room?" He asked hesitantly as he walked back over to me. I raised a brow at him with a smirk on my face.
"Don't get any ideas! It's just really late and if you were attacked or something how am I supposed to do this project alone? It's a serious grade!" He made his excuse. I just smiled.
"I'd love it if you walked with me to my room," I said holding my bag close to my chest.
"Good, I wouldn't really have let you say no anyway." He smiled back at me. I rolled my eyes and lightly pushed on his shoulder, he chuckled in response before placing his hand on my lower back leading me out of the room.

I didn't really notice the time in the music room but I guess we spent the whole day together. It was already dark out. I looked around and saw that the campus was completely empty, it definitely would have been scary if I had to walk out here by myself. I stepped closer to Shawn but didn't even notice how close we were in the first place. I ended up pushing myself into his side.

"Sorry!" I said jumping back to where I originally was. Shawn didn't glare at me, give me dirty looks, or even commented. He just stayed quiet his hands in his pockets with a smirk creeping on his face. He then took a step towards me and we reconnected but this time I didn't pull away. I felt my cheeks burning so I looked away from him hoping he didn't notice me blush.

"So... like I said today wasn't awful and I... y'know... had fun." Shawn shrugged as we walked through the empty campus.
"Really now?" I asked raising a brow at him.
"Look don't get too excited, I had fun, I'm in a good mood but... I don't forgive you for what you did to me." He said with a stern face. I pursed my lips.
"You know in a sense Lisa's right. I mean not about me being a bully like the gum in hair or cheating on Lucas all the time. I mean that I didn't really stay in contact with you..." I trailed off. Thinking about it I stopped in my tracks and reached out grabbing Shawn's arm before he could walk any further. He stopped as well but didn't turn around to face me.

"Shawn I didn't intentionally mean to ignore you. I didn't mean to leave you behind like you meant nothing because if I'm being honest you meant so much to me. You made it exciting to hang out with you in high school, I'll admit I got some stupid high from being with you because Lisa always told me I shouldn't. But seeing you struggle, seeing you always alone it made me want to be with you more. But after graduation... My life just got harder and harder to deal with. I never cut you out of my life because I found amusement in it... I was just... I..." I couldn't find the right words to explain to him. Thinking about the abuse that started with Lucas I started to choke up as I looked down trying hard not to cry.

"Cecilia..." I heard Shawn say in a soft tone. His fingers gently slid under my chin and lifted my head to look at him.
"Are you ok?" He asked. Tears started to brim in my eyes.
"N-No..." I cried out closing my eyes tight as I started sobbing. With no words, Shawn removed his hand from under my chin and I felt his hands on my back pulling me to his body holding me in a tight embrace as I sobbed into his chest. I felt his chin rest on the top of my head. He took in a deep breath and sighed as he lightly rubbed my back with his hand. I wrapped my arms around his waist holding him tight. I never thought Shawn would be holding me like this, I thought he genuinely hated me but I suppose there's still some good in him. Maybe Lisa didn't completely destroy him.

"Cecilia..." Shawn spoke to me, not letting go of his grasp on me though. I didn't say anything but instead tried to quit my crying.
"Does... Lucas... Does he hurt you?" He asked hesitantly, not sure if he should have asked me or not. I just stayed silent, squeezing his waist and trying to bury my face further in his chest. I wanted to disappear instead of answering that question.

"Cecilia." He sounded concerned. He then put his hand on my shoulders and pulled me off of him. He stood me in front of him as he looked down at me with a pained expression. "Does he?" He asked again. I opened my mouth ready to speak,

"Shawn!" That same high pitched voice called out from behind me. I quickly turned around and there she was, the devil herself.
"What the fuck, you were supposed to text me when you were done with the stupid project thing not standing around cradling this dumb bitch! What the fuck is this?" Lisa yelled. Shawn let go of my shoulders and stood up straight.
"Lisa calm down it's not what you think ok? I was just talking to Cecilia and-"
"Why?! Why are you wasting your time with her?!" She continued yelling.
"Look, Cecilia's my friend now alright? No matter what you say, Lisa." He raised his voice but didn't yell. I felt my heart skip a beat when he called me his friend. I smiled to myself as he defended me.

"No Shawn, I'M your friend, she's NOTHING to you." She said something all too familiar, and almost as if something snapped in me I stood tall.
"Listen, Lisa," I started, "I know you. I know you wanted us to worship you like you were some kind of idol but you can't control other people's feelings. Just like in high school, you told me I couldn't be friends with Shawn but look, we found a way to work past the bullshit you basically started and honestly I feel so happy! Can't you just let it be?" I ranted. She just looked at me surprised that I even spoke up.
"Excuse me, Cecilia it just sounded like... like you were talking back to me." She huffed out.
"Oh this is too precious, I'm so glad I called Lucas as soon as I witnessed your guy's little moment out here because now... well he has a lot to say to you, but I suppose you were too busy canoodling MY boyfriend to notice your own." She smiled a big and wicked smile at me. My heart dropped and I immediately started looking for my phone.

"Fuck!" I hissed feeling my front pockets, my chest, my back pockets.
"Cecilia it's ok, you can just call him back in the morning." Shawn tried to comfort me as he placed a hand on my shoulder.
"No, no, no, no, no. No, Shawn, you don't understand." I said frantically as I even looked on the floor.
"You left it in the room." Lisa chimed in.
"Fuck!" I yelled and immediately started sprinting for the dorm building.
"Cecilia!" I heard Shawn call out to me but I ignored him and just kept running.
"Shawn what the fuck seriously?!" I heard Lisa yell too and not too far behind I heard an extra pair of footsteps running after me.