The next day I was, again, in class with Shawn sitting next to me, this time we had to share a small table which meant we had to sit uncomfortably close to each other. I was taking notes on an assignment like we were supposed to but Shawn was just playing on his phone. I could care less about his grades or what he decides to do in class but honestly? He's an idiot for ignoring our first class assignment.
As I was writing I felt something bump my arm making me mess up the word I was writing. I just closed my eyes and took in a deep breath knowing it was Shawn. When I opened my eyes I looked over at him and he just sat there with a big stupid smile on his face trying to act innocent.
I just narrowed my eyes at him for a minute before turning back to my paper and erasing my mistake then correcting it. I continued taking down the notes and listening to the instructor. Just when I thought we moved past Shawn's little annoyance I was bumped yet again making another mistake on my paper. I just dropped my pencil and looked over at Shawn AGAIN.
He had his hands folded on the table in front of him and he was looking up and around while his lips were puckers as if he was whistling. I just quietly stood up and moved my chair as far away from him as possible. I was at the complete end of the table but at least I didn't have to stay stuck next to Mendes. Why was he acting like this? Was he trying to be cute with me? He hates me why would be silly like this with me? Either way, I'm in no mood to take part of it.
The professor finally excused us for the day. I feel like I was being tortured with Shawn's constant annoyances. He's "accidentally" bumped my arm many times, coughed loudly into his hand in my direction or dropped his pen on the floor and when he went to retrieve it he'd "accidentally" graze his hand on my thigh or butt. But I just ignored it all trying to do my work.
As I was packing Shawn just stayed in his seat looking at me, more so my hands.
"So... did I hurt your wrist the other day?" He asks out of nowhere. I stopped and looked up at him confused.
"You... uh. I don't know you looked haggard and depressed recently. Just please don't um... y'know." He shrugged.
"Excuse me?" I finally broke my vow of silence towards him.
"Look I don't know what the fuck you're going through but just. Fuck I don't know!" Shawn stood up flustered.
"A-Are you being nice to me for once?" I questioned still very confused.
"Shut up." He growled turning his back to me. He reached down and grabbed his bag off the floor.
"I-It's ok to be nice to people." I tried explaining to him but he just scoffed.
"Yeah but you aren't people, you're a devil." He explained. I just rolled my eyes.
"Whatever. Just consider other people's feelings before you speak to them."
"You have room to talk." He mumbled to himself but I heard him clear as day.
"Shawn, whatever Lisa told you isn't true. You never let me explain myself but I'm going to now." I said placing my bag back down. No words, Shawn dropped his bag and sat back down giving me his full attention.
"In high school I genuinely liked you. I thought you were cute and smart and I wanted to just hug you every time I saw you. But every time I was seen with you Lisa would find out, come to me and tell me that she made me for popularity and if I was seen with you it'd ruin mine and her reputations. I still went against her that day I kissed you and she found out, after that we fought and so many bad things have happened in my life. She caused something very serious in my life to happen and I've been living in fear since then. So please, if you love me as much as you say, just... try to believe me." I explained as much as I could.
He seemed unphased as he pursed his lips.
"Right... and how long did it take you to come up with that?" He asked. I just sighed in disappointment, hoping he'd understand.
"Ok... I explained my side and you choose Lisa. Have a happy life, be careful." I said grabbing my bag. Just as I was about to put it on my shoulder, Shawn quickly snatched it and held it close to his chest like it was a pillow.
"Give it," I said holding out my hand.
"Answer my question." He commanded.
"What?" I asked unenthused, just tired and wanting to leave.
"Why didn't you try to keep in contact with me after we graduated?" He asked seriously. I just furrowed my brows.
"What?" I asked again.
"Why? Wasn't I good enough to talk to? You say you liked me, you say you cared but you acted like you didn't. I waited." He said. I watched as his hand gripped my bag tighter.
"I...I don't know-"
"That's not an answer!" He barked cutting me off, standing up quickly, knocking the chair down behind him. He threw my bag down out of anger, thankfully all that was in there were my books and pens.
"Shawn listen, I-"
"No, you fucking listen, Cecilia!" He cut me off again, "I waited for you! I walked down that street we walked together on almost every damn day hoping to see you, hoping that one of those days I'd run into you and somethings could have changed! I doubt you even knew it but we literally live 2 houses away from each other! Don'tyou think that should show how much you cared?!" He yelled. His face was turning red from anger and all I could do was stare at him in shock.
"You want me to believe you never meant to hurt me but you never even tried to be my friend! You never once asked to stay in contact. You literally told me you liked me, kissed me, then said you'd never see me again! I was happy because the prettiest and nicest girl liked me! I thought something would happen between you and I but you know what happened instead?! Lisa! She came to me! She found me and told me the truth! But what did you do? Exactly what you wanted! To play with my feelings and leave me in pain! You say Lisa's lying but how?! How when you did exactly what she explained to me?!" He came closer to me as he yelled, completely heated.
"I-I..." I was speechless.
"Next time you want to fucking lie to me, save your breath." He seethed at me while he picked up his own bag. I just stayed quiet, feeling defeated. And like that he pushed past me, purposely bumping into me, making me stumble a bit as he stormed out.
YOU ARE READING
Queen
Fanfiction"You tried to convince me that you liked me, gave me hope. Now it's my turn." He whispered in a low raspy tone of voice then immediately crashed his lips against mine. My eyes shot wide open, his were closed tight. I tried to pull away but before th...
