Unspoken Words

Excerpt from the book I'll never write #2

        I know life well enough to remember this familiar feeling that keeps lingering in my entire being the moment I felt the sudden need to just get lost and never come back. 

       To get lost in the sea of unfamiliar faces and get stuck in the middle where no one will know you or even find you at all. Isn't it better to just disappear when life gives you the very reason to?
  
      I think I like it there.

      Even though I know it will be hard, it's way better than being here and not to feel welcome at all. It's like you are in that place, in that particular time but your not living the moment at all. You exist and you are breathing the air of life and you don't even have the right to complain because you are so damn fine but you aren't. You are not okay and you are not close in being one.

       Every thing just keeps on getting worst and worst every minute of your fucked up life and it makes you want to drag yourself down under like what everybody else does.
   
   Dragging you down and making you look shittier than you already are.