In Memory of a Dark Era

Inevitable Death

Impulsively, you ran to the source of the sound ignoring the alarming shout coming from Dazai.

You didn't even think about your injury or exhaustion when you sprinted with all your energy to the area where your eyes analysed the body that laid motionlessly on the ground.

It seemed to be the man that had been chasing you previously, badly injured and as still as a statue.

The sight began to increasingly blur due to your accumulating tears, dropping faster with every blink.

You knew this man.

He was one of your subjects, a mafia member under Arata's command.

You knew it was him from the moment you had the leisure of time to properly study him. Back when Dazai had stopped him from brutally murdering you.

That was the time when your heart ached as a piece of your past resurfaced.

What made it all worse was the fact that this man had a twin brother whom will attempt living a normal life only to claw down his lover's face and get dragged into jail by the Armed Detective Agency.

It wasn't clear to you back when you had examined the picture of twins that Dazai had shown you in the shabby apartment. You just never knew that the man currently lying on the floor had any family or how he looked like even due to the mask he was never seen without.

Their abilities and identical features assured you of their relation with every blink you made to clear your vision.

You haven't only ruined these people's lives, their families were victims of your work.

The world fell heavily on your shoulders, crushing you to your knees.

You only wanted a decent job, a life like any other ordinary human, but your haste blinded you to the warning signs of a cleverly written contract.

Before you knew it, you were apart of the Mafia, your biochemistry degree was regarded as a medical one and you became vulnerable to the emotional and physical abuse of a strict executive.

The darker your surroundings got, the senseless you became to the idea of morality and empathy. Until you met a young man not older than 13. Frail and frightened by the world with an ability too big for his own shoes. All your self-pity vanished at the sight of him and you couldn't help yourself when your arms took him into your bosom and into your life. You fed him, nursed him and sheltered him until colour blossomed on his face.

Yet, he was still a sickly boy by nature.

Driven by your desperate need to keep him well, you studied all night long gulping one cup of caffeine after the other, ignoring your physical needs completely. You overworked like a mad woman, trying to achieve the impossible.

Eventually, you came up with a solution, but the side effects shoved you all the way to the starting point.

Your research was nothing but decoration on your desk only to be acknowledged later by a Mafioso and taken to your power-hungry executive.

By attempting to rescue a life, you had endangered 20.

A crime you were so deeply apologetic for and devastated by. Had you known that your world would crash to this moment, you would've burnt down every last word of your work. Yet, you were unfortunate enough to return to this period of life, instead.

Reluctantly, you wiped your face with the back of your sleeves almost aggressively and then opted to drag yourself to the man.

"I'm sorry," you whispered as it was your final act to lessen the weighty burden. Your voice almost broke when you repeated: "so... So sorry to you... and your brother," your hand stretched to his eyes, closing them and you cleared your throat before giving your parting words to him, "rest in peace.... along with everyone else."

The building started to catch fire covering the commotion within its walls with the rage of its flames. After taking in a shaky breath, you forced yourself to a standing position and turned away from the man and the building.

You left without another glance, without Dazai and without any time to overthink your decisions.

Staying another moment might weaken your resolve and force you to run back. To save that boy from this death only to lead him into a misery ending with death.

All's well when pain is diluted to a simpler form. It puts you at ease to know that he didn't die suffering or aching like he did from the side effects of the enhancer.

You were the only one who knew how he died because you were the one who strapped a mask on his face and had him slowly lose consciousness of the world while inhaling the lethal carbon monoxide gas.