"Questions are asked to be answered."
"You need to make up your mind Tiff."
Yuri's words had been bugging her since that night when she learned about Taeyeon's upcoming meeting with Jan's parents that's set three days from now.
Three days from now and she'll see Taeyeon's girlfriend again and ofcourse she had to pretend that she's okay with it when all she want to do was pull Taeyeon away from the younger girl take her away, far away where no one can separate them ever. She wants Taeyeon for herself, but the question of "Am I brave enough?" was still lurking around in one corner of her mind.
Yes, she loves Taeyeon and Yes, she wants to be with Taeyeon, heck she'll do everything just to be with her but everytime she asks herself if she's brave enough to hurt the people she loves, her loving boyfriend Nichkhun and her family who's so proud of her as well as their fans who'd been there with every step of their career, her rational thinking always prevails. She doesnt want to hurt any of them, but she doesnt want to hurt herself anymore, but if she's ever going to be true to herself, she'll end up still hurt either way.
And so she had spend the past few days thinking about every possibility that she'll be face with, not just her but the entire Girl's Generation as well, but a firm and final decision is still vague. She still cannot make up her mind, and the only thing she really wants to do was get a serious talk with Taeyeon once and for all if when, no one knows. Taeyeon was still trying to avoid being in a room with her and she had stopped trying to get the older girl's attention as well, although the last few days were spent with them together but being with someone else's presence always prevents them from talking, she's never had any alone time with Taeyeon and she hates it. She hates how she cannot make any decision without having to know the truth first. She wants to hear what Taeyeon feels or still feeling about her, atleast when she knows it, she probably would be able to see things through or give her any idea what she should do. She knows exactly what she wants and that's Taeyeon, there's no question about that, but what she should do about it is the big question she cannot give any answer to.
"Fany?" She raised her head and was a bit startled to see the face of the person she's been thinking about, she chuckled a bit thinking that even her brain was pulling her leg. "And now Im hallucinating." She chuckled again as she held her cup of coffee.
"Fany, are you okay?" And Tiffany raised her head again, this time she was sure that she's not going nuts and Taeyeon was really standing in front of her table, holding her own cup of coffee.
"Ohh sorry, I didnt saw you there. Going for a walk?" Tiffany shouldnt have asked but she wasnt sure now if Taeyeon's daily routines have changed as well. A nod was her answer. "C-can I join you?" She was hoping that Taeyeon would have no excuses this time and to her luck, her leader nodded and she mentally thanked Yuri and Jessica for being horny rabbits which had been her reason for going out at 6 in the morning.
It wasnt cold, but she felt chills ran on her back as they walked out of the coffee shop near their dorm. It was suddenly cold for her since no warm hands were holding hers which she was waiting for Taeyeon to do,hold her hand, but the older girl's hand were kept intact inside her pocket.
"Taeyeon," She started and when a hum answered her she continued, "I want to ask you something but I dont know if you'll answer me honestly."
"You wont know if you wont try."
There was silence, a comforting one that eased Tiffany to muster all her courage to finally ask it. "Do you.. Are you.. Have you.." She was a bit lost how to ask it without sounding so desperate.
"Tiff.."
"Do you have feelings for me Tae?"
And they both stopped walking and stared at each other, eyes were searching, questioning. Taeyeon opened her mouth to answer and Tiffany's hands balled up into a fist, anticipating the answer that she was hoping would give her questions answers as well.
"Tiffany I.." Tiffany gulped as she heard her name being said but got disappointed when her phone rang that made Taeyeon stopped talking. She wouldnt have answered it, but it was Nichkhun and she had told him to go to the coffee shop prior to her unplanned meeting with her leader.
"Hello Baby?" Tiffany started, Taeyeon was about to resume walking but she held her wrist, her eyes were pleading for her to stay.
"Im sorry but something very important came up." Taeyeon's eyes which was formerly darted on the ground rose up and met Tiffany's sturdy ones. "Yeah, I'll see you later tonight." And with that Tiffany turned her phone off, not wanting for anyone to disturb her again.
"So, where were we? Right, I asked you if you have feelings for me. So, do you?" Tiffany asked again and again Taeyeon opened her mouth only to close it when this time it was her phone that rang. She stared at it for a while, and Tiffany knew who it was she was about to grab it but Taeyeon immediately retracted her hand. "I'll just tell her Im in the middle of something very important right now." Although Tiffany was a bit upset that Taeyeon chose to answer her phone, it was immediately changed into happiness as she realized the older girl caught on the words she purposefully used, her hands still not letting go of Taeyeon's wrist.
"Hello Baby.. Yeah.. I missed you too.." Taeyeon's eyes were soft and pleading and Tiffany doesnt know if its for the endearment or for saying she misses her girlfriend too, but she's sure Taeyeon was saying sorry with her eyes. "No, Im actually out for a walk.. What? Youre already here? Where?"
"Behind you." Both Tiffany and Taeyeon turned around and saw Jan standing few feet away from them. "I wanted to surprise you."
"Well.. I.. uhh.. Im really surprised." Taeyeon said pulling her hand back as she walked towards Jan. "Hi Tiffany." Tiffany only nodded. "Tae, lets just talk some other time. And forget about what Ive asked." She said and without looking back, she walked ahead with no destination at all, she just wants to get away from the couple, as far as she can. She started running.. faster and faster, hoping that it'll tire her out and most importantly, her heart.
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