Hand in Hand

Chapter 29

Don didn't know what to say. Did his love and devotion to her and their children after almost 4 decades not prove to her that he would NEVER do that to her? He was angry. He was hurt. However, he didn't want to let his emotions get the better of him; and say something to her he would regret. He just removed his touch from her and glanced in the back. "I should get them upstairs; and we shouldn't discuss this here." Was all Don's said. His mind was racing as he got the babies' carriers out of the back of the car and loaded them onto the stroller. He walked with Meryl into the elevator as he pushed the babies. He didn't ignore her; but he didn't reach out to her either. All kinds of thoughts were going through his mind: Does she not trust me? How does she not know that she and the kids are everything to me? Does she really think I'm like all those other pricks? After everything we have gone through together she really thinks I would do that? Don opened their suite for her and pushed the stroller in. "I'll lay them down." He noticed she didn't follow him into their bedroom as he went to lay the babies down. He thought it was strange she wasn't in there with him. After making sure the babies stayed asleep he went to find his wife; and his heart broke when he saw her laying on the bed in the guest bedroom with her back to the door, crying. All his hurt and anger melted away. Why wouldn't she think what she did? She had been through so much hell; and especially by his mother lately. Even though she had no reason to be, he knew she was insecure because of his mother. And all around them, marriages that had been strong for longer than they had been married were collapsing. Her asking him that question showed him how much she loved and adored him; not that he needed proof of that. As he watched her heart break he was angry all over again, but not at her; he was angry at his mother for making his wife who was usually so self-assured doubt herself, and worse, doubt him. He was also angry at himself for making her wonder where they stood; and for basically giving her the silent treatment.

***

Meryl buried her face in her pillow and cried. She hoped she was wrong but  Don being so cool towards her told her what she needed to know; at least Jane would get a better daughter-in-law, and maybe Don and the kids would finally get the wife and mother they deserved. She tensed when she felt him crawl in bed behind her. "It's okay, Don; you made your feelings known loud and clear."

"I don't think I did." Don whispered in her ear as he held her from behind; and held her as close to his body as possible; not letting her move from his hold. "I was caught off guard by your question; I was caught completely off guard because we are not them. Yes, they have been married longer than we have; and yes, they always seemed so happy. However, we have something they didn't."

Meryl was already feeling better; THIS is what she needed him to do earlier. "What's that?"

"They are NOT us; we are NOT them. Which means they don't have our love." Don whispered holding her even tighter. "We could NEVER EVER be them, baby; or these other couples. We could NEVER be them because we are one, we are a unit. Not only are we as close as close can be; we also communicate. When something is wrong with the other we know, we talk about it; we work together to make sure the other feels they are heard and understood. We would NEVER get to that point. There is NO you without me. These men are fucking pigs. I would NEVER EVER look for someone else; I don't need to because you satisfy me in so many damn ways, ways I don't think you even know. The thought of not having you to hold at night, or to kiss when we wake up in the morning scares the fucking hell out of me. I have top shelf in the wife department; why in the hell would I EVER look somewhere else. That's not me, baby; and that is not us. You are the BEST thing that has EVER happened to me; I just need you to trust that."

Meryl quickly turned in his arms and placed her hands on his face, leaning her forehead against his. "I DO trust you, baby; more than you can never know. I know that won't be us, I do. You are EVERYTHING to me and I know NEITHER of us would ever let us get to that point. I am just raw, Don. Rebecca targets you for a month; and then she abducts you 3 and you are assaulted while Mann comes after me. We start to heal from that then the fucking paparazzi. I hear Stacey's heart break about how George is with someone his family FINALLY approves of; and I think about your mom and how I will NEVER be good enough for her. I am just raw, Don Man; but it has NOTHING to do with you. You show me, and prove to me every damn day how much you love me. I just thought maybe you would want someone younger who your mother..."