whatever it takes - odell beckham jr.

chapter twenty

if i know one thing with absolute certainty, is that i could never get exhausted of the sight in front of me. i swear to god there is nothing else i would rather see every morning.

ira is standing at the kitchen island, headphones in her ears, dancing around in place whilst cooking breakfast. a million memories rush through my head and for a second, i feel like an 18 year old kid again. falling in love with the one woman i wasn't supposed to have. except this time, it's different. i'm not falling in love with her. i'm already in love with her, the same as i have been for the last six years.

i lean against the doorway, peering at her for a while until she notices me standing there and abruptly stops. she pulls the headphones out of her ears, examining her face redden as she bites her lip.

"oh, hey. how long have you been standing there?"

"not nearly long enough." i grizzle, before nodding to the stove. "what are you making? it smells hella good."

she beams wide with a shrug. "honestly, it's kind of a surprise. you didn't really have much in the fridge. so, it's just something i made up."

"yeah, sorry about that. i should of had it stocked up."

"don't apologise. anyhow, that's my job. isn't it? you had enough stuff in there for me to figure this out." she waves to the pan with her hand. "it's just scrambled egg. you had a green pepper and a couple pieces of bacon that didn't look too old, and then some eggs. i also found some sausage in the freezer."

"impressive. do you need any help?"

she purses her lips. "no. but, thanks. cooking is my job. however, if you have a few minutes, maybe you could give me a run through on what you want cleaned and when. and then of course where the grocery store is along with a list."

i just walk towards her, shamelessly staring her up and down before grabbing a bottle of water out of the fridge. "ira, i mean. i really don't need you to do much cleaning."

"you hired me to be your housekeeper. i'm pretty sure that involves cleaning."

her eyes level with mine and since this is all new, i shrug. "fine. we'll go over it when we eat."

"good." she turns her attention back to the pan. "this should be ready soon."

i lean back against the island, taking long sips of my water and pretending to busy myself reading the newspaper when in reality, the only thing i'm paying attention to is her. her bed shorts are tiny and coupled with just a sports bra? there's a whole lot of ira on display.

she glances up at me, catching me in my stare, so i force my eyes back down. i flip the page, noticing an entire page with circles all over it. "what's this?"

she sends a look of confusion my way. "a newspaper?"

"obviously." i kiss my teeth. "i mean, why's all this stuff circled?"

she wrinkles her nose. "it's not just stuff, i'm looking for a car."

"you don't need a car." i finish, crumbling the newspaper into a ball and tossing it into the trash.

she snatches it back out, setting it on the island further away from me. "why you gotta do that for? i actually spent time this morning going through all of those."

"like i said, you don't need a car. you can use one of mine."

"i'm not using one of your cars. i wanna buy my own."

i cross the room to the other end of the island, snatching the newspaper up and narrowing my eyes. "all of the cars that you circled here sound like a damn death trap!" i slam the paper back down and fold my arms. "you not buying summin like that."

the spatula is whacked down and ira spins, matching my stance and giving me a hard stare.

"odell, listen. i've already agreed to work for you, which, trust me. i'm still not convinced was the best idea. now you wanna try and tell me what kind of car i can or can't have? hell no. the cars circled are what i can afford. so, let it be."

"what i'm saying is, it's ridiculous for you to buy a car when i have five. you can have whichever one you want. or if you don't like any of them, i'll get you something different! something safe, for you and adonis."

"no." she gestures me away, turning around and grabbing a couple of plates from the cabinet. "you don't get to leverage with my son against me in every argument. i'm a safe driver. enough said."

"ira."

"odell." she sighs. "do not push it right now."

we stand, staring at each other, each of us with our legs spread and arms crossed, ready for a full-blown fight. her eyes narrow as her nostrils flame and i'm sure i look the same. then again, i must tread lightly here in order to try and win her back.

"whatever you say." i throw my hands up whilst she smirks, turning back towards the stove.

she grins, handing me a plate of food. "i'm glad we can move on."

i sink down into a chair at the island and she takes the one across from me. "where's the little man?"

"sleeping." she smiles. "he never wakes up this early, he won't wake up till around 10."

"that's nice."

"yeah, it is. for those rare days when i get to sleep in. but most days, i just take advantage of having a few hours in the morning to get the things i need to do done before he wakes up."

i pause, setting my fork down on my plate. i've got a lot of questions for ira, and while most of them are not mine to ask, i really feel like i deserve to know the answer to this one.

"i know you said you don't wanna talk about adonis' dad. but i really wanna know the story. i mean, i get he's not in the picture. how come?"

she sighs long and hard, finally shaking her head. "the short version of a long story is that he was one of my professors in college. he was young, good looking, smart and charming. and very much married. i of course, had no idea. he never wore a ring and was on campus so much that it never really crossed my mind he could possibly have a family at home, which i found out way too late." her head rests on her hands.

"we had been sleeping together for about three months when i found out that i was pregnant with adonis. the day that i told him, he freaked. he became a completely different person in the blink of an eye. he cut all ties with me in that moment and told me that if i spoke to anyone about it, he would make my life a living hell. he also threatened to fail me, which since we were so close to the end of the semester and that was my last class i needed for my bachelor's degree, i panicked. he wanted nothing to do with the baby and there was no way i was gonna force him. my son doesn't need someone like that in his life."

"what a dick." i crack my knuckles.

"he is." she agrees. "i kept my head down for the last few weeks of school, and after that i applied to grad school in chicago. right before i left town, i met up with his wife and let her know. as a woman who's been cheated on in the past, i felt obligated to let her know."

her eyes lock with mine, as the words leave her mouth. there's nothing i can say back to that.

"she didn't even care. i was seriously in shock by her reaction. she could have cared less that her husband had cheated on her and was about to father a child with someone else. he's never tried to contact me, never made any moves in order to attempt and have a relationship with my son. so, it's just adonis and i. and i'm fine with that."

"i have no idea how you do it." i tell her, meaning every word. ira has always been a very strong woman even when she was just a kid. but managing everything that she's already done by herself? to me, it's pretty remarkable.

my own mother was a single mom, but she never managed shit. as far back as i can remember, i was pretty much on my own. sure, she'd put a roof over our head, always temporary and only until the eviction notices were served. but that was about it.

even though ira was living in a bad neighbourhood, she was only doing that to finish school and give her son a better life. can't hate on her for doing that.