I ask my dad to help me
But he doesn't understand
What he sees as a simple google search
To me is an admission of all my failures,
Of everything I can't do on my own
And it's so much easier to tell my Daddy
Than tell the world
I keep waiting for the day
That a phone call
Will simply be a phone call
And not a battle
That phone is so much heavier than it looks
The voice that comes out of my mouth -
I am so much more exhausted
Than she sounds
I wish I'd never gotten an email
It only brings me spam
And mess
Random receipts
Linkedin links
And pain
Driving is getting harder and harder
But I haven't told anyone that
I'm praying for the day
I can breathe like everyone else
Live like everyone else
Live like not every step is a live-wire pain
Every word a drain
They ask if I'm trying
I promise
I am
