abyss ↣ joe sugg au

two

[Trigger Warning: mentions of depression/suicide]

Charlotte's day played out similar to any other, waking up and kicking the damn bucket that was collecting water from the ceiling, and then cussing at the spillage and fretting about it whilst trying to clear it up. Going to work and getting through the day by trying to solve a Rubik's cube and getting disapproving why-does-she-still-work-here looks from her colleagues. In fact, the only difference was the blue eyes and black lip ring at 3.23am.

"You know, rumour has it, if you stare into the water for long enough," She presses her shoulder next to his and leans maybe a little too far over, "it does in fact turn into a Chinese Dragon."

He drops his head and snuffles a laugh.

"You're ridiculous." He looks at her through his eyelashes with dark eyes and a hint of amusement.

"Well Bridge Boy, I have to entertain myself somehow." She shrugged.

"How can you even make jokes at this hour?" He shook his head and returned his gaze to the river.

"It's no less sane than standing on a bridge with a stranger, at this hour."

There was silence, both pairs of eyes burning into the cool stream below. The only noise was the calming sound, the persuasive sound of water at war with itself.

"Never call me Bridge Boy again," He finally broke the silence.

"I won't have to if you tell me your name."

"Joe." He says slightly agitated, "My name's Joe Sugg."

Charlotte could see the physical lump in his throat she swore, there might of even been a threat of glazed eyes.

"Nice to meet you Joe." Charlotte outstretched a hand and Joe's eyes widened in disbelief as he shook it.

"Joe the Bridge boy." Charlotte said it as if she just wanted to hear it roll off her tongue to see if she approved.

"You promised!" Joe's eyebrows raised and he lent moodily back against the barrier.

"I did no such thing." Charlotte huffed and joined him nonetheless.

They return to leaning over the barrier, shoulders pressed together but not saying a word. After a handful of minutes, Charlotte felt Joe's chin slant towards her.

"Char," Joe's voice was barely audible over the screams in her head. Char. They were already comfortable enough for Joe to totally ignore the last five letters of her name, or yet again, that might just be how he is.

"Mhm." She mumbled, grateful for the darkness that hid her flushed cheeks.

"Why didn't you like, run?" Joe's voice was raspy, "when you found out who I was, I mean."

Charlotte looks at him, blue meeting blue and creating something like the Pacific.

"I knew who you were the minute you handed me that cigarette." She looks blankly at him.

"Then why did you not run then? And why did you come back? And why the bloody hell did you call me Bridge Boy?" Joe's face displayed confusion and bewilderment and Charlotte couldn't help but bring the back of her hand to her mouth in order to stop a laugh from escaping.

"You think I'm afraid of you or some shit?" Charlotte asked, mildly amused but a lot sad.

"Aren't you scared I'm going to hurt you?" Joe's eyes were filled with confusion, disbelieving the fact Charlotte's shoulder was still pressed against him.

There was a pause.

"I came here to die anyway." She confessed, positive Joe could be here for the same reason, they both went to the middle after all.

Joe sighed, but he eased slightly. He was relieved she wasn't here for him, that she came back for a totally different reason other than to see him again. He was relieved because he didn't have to try, didn't have to try and convince her how it was because she already knew, she'd already read the articles in the paper. He wasn't so relieved though, that he could be a possible audience of her death, or hers of his. In fact, he wasn't relieved she wanted to die at all.

His brain fizzed, why would she, the girl who can make jokes at gone three in the morning, want to die?

"Why?" Was the only word that managed to escape the tide of his thoughts.

"Same reason you want too, I suppose." She huffed.

"What, does the world think you killed your girlfriend too?" Joe said with a string of sarcasm.

"No. Shut up." Charlotte turned her back to the Thames and sat down, her back wresting against the metal slates.

"Why?" Joe repeated his earlier question, realizing they hadn't established anything since he asked it last.

"I don't know." She huffed again.

Joe furrowed his eyebrows. He didn't wish to understand the string of contradicting sentences she had proclaimed to him. So he just sat next to her, in silence once again.

"And for the record," She finally spoke, "I don't read bullshit newspapers and I don't listen to bullshit people and I happen to think you're alright."

Joe looked wide-eyed for a moment. Then he smiled. He didn't know why and she didn't know why and the drunken man stumbling passed sure as hell didn't know why.

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