abyss ↣ joe sugg au

forty two

[Trigger Warning: mentions of depression/suicide]

Charlotte's dreams were painted in betrayal and she hated the colour. She blinked awake in the early hours of the morning and wiped the dried tears from the corner of her eyes. She watched Joe sleep for a while, hoping wordlessly that his dreams were the prettiest shade of blue.

She wanted to stay there for longer, wanted to watch the sun rise with warm heat beside her, but this couldn't wait. Time would never stay still. She pulled the covers back and shivered as the cool air hit her warm skin. She covered Joe back up and kissed his temple before tip-toeing across the wood floor to get to the bedroom.

It was a mess. The not-so-long-ago painted walls were barely visible behind all Joe's photography work and clothes. She rummaged around on the floor and in the wardrobe for anything to wear, not even caring if the items she chose hadn't been washed in weeks. She slid jeans on and buttoned up a flannel shirt before she caught sight of it -- nostalgia misted her thoughts as her thumbs traced over the black hoodie Joe hadn't worn for a very long time.

Charlotte thought it was fitting. Today she was going to meet her Mother. Without a seconds thought she pulled on the hoodie that still smelt of cigarette smoke and spared a look at the still sleeping Joe curled up in the covers by the far window of the living room.

She felt guilty for not telling him her plans but she knew he'd only worry. Putting her phone and money in the hoodie pockets, she exited the apartment quietly and set down the flights of stairs.

Summer was coming to an end now, and the mornings were darker and the nights longer and she felt very vulnerable in the dim light. However, it was only a short walk to The Doorstep, and she'd never been so pissed off at that very fact in her whole life. She wanted it to drag, she wanted to put this off until her last breath but the bell on the top of the door dinged as she walked in and it was too late.

Mylo was shoving pastries into the heated display case with his tongue stuck out. He hair was three shades lighter now.

"Hey." Charlotte propped her elbows on the counter.

"Jesus, you're keen." He laughed, checking his watch and scowling like Charlotte was several levels on insane for being here at this hour.

Hah.

"What can I get you?" He asked when Charlotte only offered a faint smile. He was trying so hard not to look at her stitches, bless him.

"The usual." Charlotte rolled her eyes but she didn't blame Mylo for forgetting, it felt like years had gone by since she came in here.

"Coming up." Mylo smiled and gestured for Charlotte to take a seat of her pleasing. She wondered to her usual, right next to the window where she could see everyone bustling passed. The streets were pretty much empty at the moment though, a few people in smart business suits hurried along with heads down and briefcases in hand, probably heading to the train station.

Charlotte needed to text Andrea because she hadn't yet and that's the only way she'll get her Mother to come here. Andrea might of had her Mother's number, but she sure as hell didn't and her head hurt just thinking about it.

She'd just drink her coffee first. Then she'd text Andrea.

"That's £2.75 then please." Mylo placed the coffee down in front of Charlotte and bounced on his heels as he waited for the payment.

Charlotte thanked him and dug her hands in her pocket for some change. When she retracted her hand, not only did her money escape her grip, but a folded piece of paper fell down to the floor.