Okay, Maybe I'm A Bit Gay

T H I R T Y - T H R E E

~ Chapter 33 ~

WE DIDN'T KNOW WHAT to do first. Not because there were just so many fun options that our heads were going to explode thinking about them but because we all needed to do was pick a ride that was worth standing in the line for an hour or two. It took us a while but as we walked around, we finally found a ride worth our while.

When we got in line, everyone was pretty quiet. That was until Kabelo and Ashley started to be that annoying couple in public. They were throwing compliments at each left and right, being all cute and what not. Meanwhile, Saya and I watched.

"You want to know a secret?" Kabelo asked.

"What is it?" Ashley asked.

I wanted to know too so I listened.

"I'm actually really terrified of rides like this. I hate rollercoasters."

"Oh no. We could go hang back and wait together on the bench for Saya and Alvin."

"Uh, no!" Everyone looked at me from my sudden outburst. I cleared my throat. "I mean, no because if you guys don't get on, Saya and I won't either. This is supposed to be a double date after all."

"I agree. If Kabelo sits out, we all sit out," Saya said.

Ashley smiled and took Kabelo's hand. "Okay, let's go find something else to do. There's more than rollercoasters here."

Kabelo smiled. "Thank you guys." He smiled at everyone but me.

The truth was that I just didn't want him and Ashley to be alone because I didn't want them to bond without me being around. If we would've left them behind, I would have just stood in the line and thought about what they talked about and if they held hands or not.

I would've gone crazy.

Ashley and Kabelo took the lead with their hands tightly intertwined. They were swinging their arms while laughing and exchanging cutesy glances. He even kissed her on the cheek which made me take the lead just so I could do the same.

When I kissed Saya, her cheeks burned a bright red and she looked at me with the biggest smile. I wanted me and Saya to be the better couple so I made sure to one-up Kabelo on everything he did. He bought Ashley a drink, I bought Saya a meal and fed her. I even wiped her mouth. Kabelo won Ashley a stuffed animal, I won Saya three.

Kabelo confronted a guy who bumped Ashley without saying excuse me so I confronted guys who gave Saya as much as a look. For most of that day, I felt like I was competing with Kabelo and it wasn't just with our dates. When we both got into our go-karts, I made sure to pass him up and I made sure to beat him in everything we did.

~x~

After our long day of walking and standing, we all sat down together under a colorful umbrella while we ate on our snow cones. Ashley and Kabelo sat across from me and Saya. While Saya and Ashley talked, Kabelo and I were trying our best not to look at each other and focus on our dates. I would randomly throw my arm around Saya or kiss her cheek and Kabelo would do the same.

He even went as far as to lying on Ashley's shoulder and cuddling her. I was livid.

While Ashley and Saya talked, I grabbed Saya's face tried to pull her in for a kiss but she slapped me.

"What's going on with you?" Saya hollered.

"What are you talking about?"

"Did you think by man handling my face like that you would earn a kiss? Did you think that anything you did for me today would have earned you a kiss?"

"What do you mean? I've been treating you with so much love and respect all day today!"

She sighed and then let out an angry chuckle. "I thought you were better than this, Alvin! You were basically using me to make Ashley jealous!"

"Me?" "Ashley?"

"It's obvious that you have some sort of feelings for her so I say go for it but I don't want to be apart of some love triangle." Saya took her stand. "I'm done, Alvin. I think you're cool and all but face the facts. You only liked me to try to get over Ashley."

She walked away but I ran after her. "That's not true, Saya. I'm over Ashley, I like you. Like really like you, Saya. Please give me another chance."

She stopped and turned to me. "I didn't want to say it back there but I know you and Kabelo have something going on. I don't know what it is but just know that I witnessed it when you two first met and I could tell that there was something there. Even if you deny it, I know that it's there."

I couldn't speak.

"I like you, Alvin but us trying anything at this point would be pointless. Your heart lies elsewhere and sadly, it's not with me." She placed a kiss on my cheek and then forced a smile my way.

"Saya, I'm sorry," I said.

A tear slipped down her cheek and she quickly wiped it away. "Don't do that. There's nothing for you to be sorry about. Have a good night, alright?" I nodded and just watched her as she disappeared into the crowd.

I then turned around and Kabelo pushed passed me. I managed to quickly grab his arm but right after, I was ass down on the floor. He was crying. He had tears pouring down his burning red eyes and it broke me but what broke me, even more, was that he stared at me like he hated me. Like he wanted nothing more to do with me.

"I don't even know why I came to this stupid thing. Oh, wait. I know! I came because I wanted to see you and hear your voice again after you went completely ghost on me! I came here hoping that we could talk about what happened between us and get over it like the grown men we are but then I realized that you still have a lot of growing up to do! And what kills me, even more, is that you know how hurt I was about boys like Jace but then you turned around and ended up just like him and for that I hate you! So please stay the fuck out of my life!"

After all of that, I still had the audacity to get up and stumble after him. I wanted to make it better but once I finally came to the realization that there was nothing I could do at that point, I started crying and then I couldn't walk anymore but before I could fall to my knees, Ashley was there to catch me and hold me.

But who was going to hold my Kabelo when he cried? And yet, even though he told me he hated me, I still couldn't help but to feel love for him.