The Colour of Sadness

because I love your smile

Do you remember the day we met?

In that sunlit spot at the corner of the library .

I was always there in the afternoons, wasting my time away in fantasy worlds long forgotten.

When you came.

Pulled out the chair and tilted your head to the side, a small smile playing on your lips.

"You're always alone, aren't you?"

And I was surprised, because no one had ever come up to me like this.

This was how we started.

And I wondered, why me?

But then I realised, you were always alone too.

You were just like me, in some ways.

It was beautiful at the start.

We didn't need anyone else, all we needed was the two of us.

We were best friends.

Or were we?

You know, you were always so cheerful, smiling, smiling, always smiling.

Except for that one time.

We were walking home, the river overflowing with orange and gold from the dying sun, and you were strangely silent.

You were walking in front of me when you came to a stop, and in that moment, standing in the fading daylight, you looked so alone.

"Do you wish to be free of me?"

There was a shadow that stood behind you, scythe in hand, and for a moment, I was afraid.

Then you turned, and you weren't smiling.

"You know, I wonder what it would feel like to die, would anyone miss me? Would anyone cry for me?"

And then you smiled, but it was a horrible smile, full of twisted pain and bitterness, and it made me want to cry.

Then you stepped backwards.

An angel.

That was what you looked like in that moment, a fallen angel.

Hair whipping violently around your face, your skin shining bronze in the sun, and the water turning into liquid light below you.

Falling into the river.

Then it hit me, and I was shouting your name, reaching out to grab a fistful of your shirt, yanking you back, and together, we fell onto the ground.

My back was against the warm pavement and your body was crushing mine, then you lifted yourself up by the arms and said,

"That was just a prank!"

Then you smiled, a brilliant, searing smile that burned itself into the back of my brain.