𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐞 || seongsang

21⋆Confession

A/N: I'm sorry if this chapter is a little boring... :<

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"Is something bothering you?" Hongjoong carefully asks when he and Seonghwa are walking to their next and final lecture of the day.

Had it been any other day, Seonghwa might've made a joking reply that nothing is bothering him besides the incredible hideous sweater-vest Hongjoong had decided to wear for the day. But today is not the day. Instead he just tugs his own sleeves while continuously biting his lower lip, letting Hongjoong's question hang unanswered in the air.

Four long days have passed since Seonghwa had went to Yeosang's room to bring him his phone, and he has had no rest ever since. The way Yeosang had looked at him had hit hard and even with his eyes closed Seonghwa can't escape the memory of it, as if the image of it has burnt itself into the back of his eyelids.

But at the same time he has no clue what to do about it. And to be honest he feels like he is on the very edge of giving up by now. Every time he dares to believe that things will change for the better, something happens and Yeosang pulls himself away again.

Seonghwa knows he fucked up too that night. He should never have kissed Yerin, he should just have left right away when he discovered his friends' plans at the bar. But he still feels like Yeosang made mistakes too, giving so much attention to Minho. Just thinking about how that guy had looked at Yeosang makes Seonghwa's stomach turn. And the memory of them kissing each other...

To give his brain absolutely no break, he also obsesses about the thought of when he told Yeosang those mean things in the bathroom. It's a tough battle between that scenario and the one where Yeosang kissed someone else, on which was the worst moment in Seonghwa's life.

"Seonghwa?" A gentle nudge on Seonghwa's shoulder distracts him from his thoughts.

"No... I... I'm just a little tired these days," Seonghwa replies with a quick shrug.

"Is that so?" Hongjoong raises a brow at his friend as they sit down next to each other in the auditorium. "You know you can always come to me, if something's wrong. Right?"

Seonghwa nods in silence while pretending to be busy setting up his laptop. He dodges the worried stare from his best friend, recognizing that he himself might not be entitled to be called that anymore. As Hongjoong sighs and starts opening his own shoulder bag to get ready for the lecture, Seonghwa watches him from the corner of his eye.

Hongjoong's hair, which had been bright red at the start of the semester, has faded into a calmer blond-ish pink without Seonghwa even noticing the change before just now. He realizes he hasn't been paying attention to many things lately, and he feels disappointed in himself for being such a bad friend. Not only has he cancelled numerous plans or simply declined them before they even came to be, he has also been hiding things and lied to the person who has been by his side, supporting him in everything, for the past six years.

As their professor starts the lecture Seonghwa keeps glancing at Hongjoong who is busy writing down notes, his fingers flying across the keyboard of his laptop with incredible speed and his eyes switching from the projector screen and his own every two seconds.

Seonghwa has never told Hongjoong, but he is very proud of him and his accomplishments. When the two of them met in high school Hongjoong wasn't the top of the class student that he is now. No, Hongjoong was kind of a wild kid trying everything he could to rebel against his own picture-perfect family. Seonghwa remembers thinking Hongjoong was a fool back then, and their teacher pairing them up together because Seonghwa would be a great influence for Hongjoong, didn't please him at all. No way in hell would someone like Seonghwa have anything in common with that loud, funky hair-colored, band tee wearing boy.