daddy - j.m

chapter 33 - respect

Blossom Lowe

Jason glared at me as I walked inside the kitchen. I had put my own alarm on and walked my sleepy self out of bed. "Do I have something on my face? What's the bother?"

His lips curled at the question. "Nothing. Just surprised to see you waking up this early by yourself. I was just about to go wake you up."

"Oh. Well I'm not a kid anymore. I can manage to wake up on my own."

"Right! You're a teenager. Can you make yourself breakfast as well or will I have to make your cereal?"

I groaned. "You make it better than I do."

He went up from the table, slowly, looking full of pride. "You're not all grown, see?"

"Breakfast doesn't matter. I woke up didn't I?" He opened the fridge up and brought out a bottle of icy cool milk. "It's great that you woke up." He smiled and put his hand on top of my head, stroking my hair backwards. "Why is your hair so soft today?"

"It's creepy how you notice. I straightened it."

He nodded, understanding what I had done. "I like it. Just don't tell me that it was Maddie's-"

"Maddie's straightener? I'm afraid so."

His mouth formed a straight line as he handed me my bowl. "Don't tell her that." We walked to the table.

"I won't. And you better not." I sat down and waited for him to sit down with me. As I played around with my spoon, taking the right amount of Cinnamon Toast Crunch on board, Jason coughed quietly and sat down.

"Blossom." I looked up. "Are you alright?"

As serious and genuine he sounded, I couldn't help but to grow nervous and make a silly face. I couldn't help but to shake everything off by being silly, not even close to being as serious as he was. "Yes? Why wouldn't I be alright?"

"Because I heard about last night. Just wanted to make sure you're okay." I slowly toned down on the smile I had painted my face with. "Oh. Don't worry about me so much. It wasn't that serious."

"Come on. Don't lie. I don't like it when you lie to me. I care, can't you see that?" His sweet, sweet words touched me. I put my hand up in front of my eyes and looked down, trying to pull my tears back as hard as possible. "I didn't mean to-" Jason began. "It's too early for this."

"Come here." He said and I stood up, dropped my head down and put my arms around his neck. "Look at me."

I knew that the second his face dropped with disappointment, he had seen what I was hoping he'd never notice. "Why are you wearing make up?"

I sniffled. Answering his question with my own one. "Is it all smudged?"

"Yes! That's what happens with make up!"

My cheeks were on fire, my Goodness. He was so angry at me and it was embarrassing how I was 13 and got yelled at for putting some mascara on my eyelashes. I blocked his words out, making it all sound like a next door party, unclear but loud. "Shut the fuck up!"

I did shut him up. He stared at me. "Thanks." Before my eyes could even try to follow him, he was out of the kitchen. He went to Alyssa's room. I try to be first, someone he really loves like a daughter and then I push him away, I push him further onto Alyssa.

I was so angry at myself for being so stupid. I sat back down on my chair, now all alone. I violently forced my hands upon the bowl of cereal and pushed it away from me, leaving the table dripping of milk. The bowl flew to the floor as the milk rushed forward on the floor and I realized that I had done something bad again. I let myself down, constantly.