Beauty & The Nerd

Part 34

Letting Anju go wasn't the hardest part, the hardest part was living without her, feeling that void in my life that no one could ever feel.

I mean she was so young, just a teenager, she could have done a lot in life, lived the way she wanted to but no, God dint want to give her that chance and I was so pissed.

Why couldn't be there a rule like no one would die young? It was always worse to lose someone so young when you know they'd have such a good life if they were alive.

I wish God could just have a rulebook that stated someone would die only after the age of a hundred or so, but well if the world worked according to my thoughts I wonder where we would be.

The house felt empty without her, my father only came for her funeral and after that it was like he completely disappeared, before at least he used to come home late at nights, and now since Anju was gone, he had stopped coming.

That somehow made me think that maybe even though we thought he never cared maybe he did, he came back home every day just to be sure his daughter was okay. Well that wouldn't still change the fact that he was a horrible father.

All I ever did since she left was, go to college, come back home and sit alone wondering what to do, I really missed her, I missed our arguments and conversations, I missed how she would always ask me to get new romance novels for her to read, I missed how Kabir used to come here daily, since she left he hadn't visited even once.

I knew he just needed time to heal and in the meantime he was avoiding anything that could remind him of losing her, why would he then visit the place where we lost her right?

"Arnav." Khushi shook me. I looked at her in confusion then realized I had forgotten that she was here with me.

In the past month, if Khushi hadn't been with me after we lost Anju, I guess I would have become a depressed man and started drinking like my father to avoid the pain, but Khushi stuck by me, she made sure to visit me every now and then and she even did a lot of things just trying to make me feel better.

I was so glad that she was here, because without her I really dint know how I could have survived this.

"I'm sorry I just got lost." I apologized.

"Arnav, it's been a month and all I have done is tried to be patient with you. Look I know how much you loved Anju, but you're forgetting that she loved you too. And if she was here today to see you like this, can you imagine how hurt she would feel?" Khushi asked.

"What do you expect me to do Khushi, be happy that my sister died?" I looked at her angrily.

"No. But being depressed all time isn't the answer Arnav. Everyone dies every day, if we all kept mourning for them continuously then the whole world would be depressed.

Anju accepted what life gave her and left happy, so why can't you let her go happily. You have had your time to mourn her loss, and I get it, it's difficult to lose the people we love, but that's life, we have to move on.

I'm not telling you not to remember her, but you can even remember the good memories with her, all the times you both were happy, and all, I'm sure that's what she'd want for you."

"It's not like I'm not trying Khushi, it's just hard."

"Hard but not impossible." She cupped my face and looked me into the eyes.

"Arnav I am really sorry that you lost her, I miss her too, Anju and I had become good friends and I really do miss her and so does Kabir, they might be teenagers but what they felt for each other was real.