Hopeless

Chapter 71

We follow Rick toward a door that leads into a chain link tunnel connected to the outside of the building. He opens it, heading in first with the rest of us close behind. We creep along the tunnel to the entrance, adrenaline surging through my body as I prepare myself to face whatever unknown danger lay behind it. Rick looks back at us as he steps up to the door, his machete raised as a first line of defence against whatever's on the other side. We stand on guard, ready to fight our way in if we need to. I hold my breath as Daryl steps forward carefully sliding it open, the tension in the air making the moment feel like an eternity. I sigh with relief when the passageway beyond the door is empty. Another barred gate stands in front of us. Rick moves in, the gate letting out a rusty screech as he pushes it open. Beyond the gate is a small set of steps that leads down into a big room. A guard tower with a cat walk sits high across the room. Two dirty metal picnic tables sit in the center of the room, the outer walls lined with cages. We step in cautiously, trash and debris crunch and crackle under our feet as we walk. I can see a walker in the guard tower from here. I use my knife to point up at it to make sure the others see it too. Rick nods and heads to the flight of stairs at the base of it. Daryl keeps his cross bow trained on the walker and Maggie stands guard at the bottom of the steps just in case. The silence in here is eerie, every step we take, every drip of water from the old pipes sounds deafening. I shiver from anticipation as we watch him climb the stairs. He approaches slow at first then whips up into the booth as he gets close to catch it by surprise, but the walker is already dead. It's brain splattered on the wall behind it. He keeps his machete pressed to its chest to be safe as he reaches forward and grabs the set of keys that hang from its belt. He holds them up for us all to see, confirming we've got what we need to get into the main part of the cell block. We all nod, a small victory. Rick heads back down the stairs, approaching the locked gate keeping us from the rows of cells. I peer over Rick's shoulder, trying to get a look at what we're about to face, as he fiddles with the keys trying to find the right one to get us in. The cell block is littered with blood and debris but from what I can see there can't be too many walkers. Finally we hear the clicks and clunks as Rick unlocks the gate. We all tense as the gate creaks open. We raise our weapons as we gush through the gate in one unified swoop. I turn my gun, looking into to the first cell. Empty. We walk quietly into the block, gazing into each cell. A few of them hold bodies, but so far no walkers. Daryl heads up the stairs to the second level of cells. Rick makes sure the gate at the far end of the block is locked and secure then heads up with him. The rest of us finish checking the cells down here. We got lucky. No walkers. I flinch as a loud clang erupts from above us. I back against the outer wall so that I can see up where Rick and Daryl are. They creep along the row of cells, Daryl's crossbow raised and ready. I jump as a walker throws itself at him, it's snarls breaking the uneasy silence. They press their backs against the metal railing, just out of the walkers reach and push on. There's another in the next cell. They both take out their knives, each taking one. That's it. We did it. I lower my gun with a sigh of relief. Daryl looks down at me with a smile and even with Cassandra's death heavy on my mind I can't help but smile back. I gaze around the cell block as the others do the same. It's dirty and definitely needs some TLC but it's safe. It's home now. I holster my weapon.

"I'll stay and start gathering up the bodies. T, Daryl, I could use a hand. Katie, Glenn, Maggie, why don't you guys go get the others." Rick says. I nod and so do the others. I lead the way out, eager to get back to my baby. The sun is almost blinding compared to the dimness of the prison. I squint my eyes as I make my way through the fence walkway back into the courtyard. I swallow hard at the sight of Cass' body. I try not to look, but I can't help it. Guilt floods through me, turning my blood cold. Maggie places a hand on my shoulder as we walk, like she knows what I'm thinking. I give her a weak smile. The others cheer at the sight of us.

"It's clear. It's safe." Glenn tells them. Lori looks to me as they open the gate.

"Rick's helping Daryl and T start cleaning up the walkers." I explain. She nods, the relief obvious on her face. I hurry over to Beth who has my little Rose sitting on her hip. Beth smiles, handing her over the second I reach them. "Hi sweet girl" I whisper to her, so happy to have her back in my arms.

"Mama" She replies happily.

"Lets get our things and head inside, we've got a lot of work to do." Hershel says. Everyone does as they're told. I take Ella and sit her in the grass while I gather all of our things. I load up, lifting Ella into my free arm. We all head inside with Glenn leading the way.

"What do you think?" Rick asks as we all start to walk in.

"Home sweet home." Glenn replies.

"For the time being." Rick says as he walks down the steps to greet his family.

"It's secure?" Lori asks as she takes her first look around.

"This cell block is." He answers.

"What about the rest of the prison?" Hershel asks.

"In the morning we'll find the cafeteria and infirmary." Rick explains.

"We sleep in the cells?" Beth asks warily.

"I found some keys on some guards. Daryl has a set too." Rick says.

"Come on." Carol says to Sophia. Her smile full of hope. We all spread out, everyone finding a cell. Daryl walks up to me as I head toward the end of the cell block.

"Here, let me take some of that." He says as he hangs his crossbow on his shoulder.

"Thank you." I reply with a little smile, handing him some of our stuff. "This one okay?" I ask, referring to one of the last cells. He nods.

"Good as any." I walk in, looking around. Its dirty, but thankfully no blood in this one. I drop our bags to the floor, placing them beside the doorway. I sit down on the bottom bunk of the bed, with Ella in my lap. Daryl does the same, sitting beside us. "Here, let me see." He says quietly. He takes my arm in his hands looking it over.

"Whatcha doin'?" I ask softly. He turns me a little and I let him, shifting so that he has access to my back.

"Checking for scratches." He answers quietly, his hands running gently over my shoulders and down my other arm. "You're okay" He whispers eventually, placing a loving kisses on shoulder and neck. I turn toward him, pulling him into a hug. Ella cuddled on my lap in between our embrace. I rest my forehead against his shoulder as his hands caress my back comfortingly. We don't speak, but I know he knows what I'm feeling. The grief, the guilt, the relief that our baby is finally safe, the exhaustion, the anticipation of what comes next, and the hope of finally having a secure home all at once. He pulls away, kissing my forehead as he stands. "Rick and I need to figure out shifts for watch. I'll be back soon." I nod, managing a small smile before he leaves. Ella starts to fuss, I know she's hungry. I breast feed and change her. I'm so exhausted by the time I'm done I can hardly function, but Ella's still wide awake. Giggling away while she plays, without a care in the world. Daryl comes back, he see's how completely and utterly tired I am. "Here, let me take her. You should get some sleep." He says gently. No matter how tired i may be, I know he's tired to.

"I'm okay, it's okay." I reply with a loving smile.

"I've got first watch shift anyway. Please baby, let me take her. We'll be right outside, we'll be fine. I promise." I nod with a sigh. He kisses me softly, then takes her into his arms.

"Thank you." I say gratefully.

"Just get some rest okay?" I nod, laying down on my side so that I'm still facing them.

"I love you." I tell them sleepily. He leans down, kissing me again.

"We love you too." He replies with a little smile. "Goodnight mama" Daryl says, making Ella's little hand wave as they make their way to the doorway.

"Goodnight love." I answer, so full of love for them both. And then before I know it the exhaustion pulls me into a deep sleep. My dreams full of hope for our new future here.