sentir | kim junkyu

forty

Once our classes ended, I headed out to the parking lot to get my bike.

"Miyu," I heard someone's voice and it was really obvious.

I didn't answer and continued unlocking my bike. What he said to me in class gave me the feeling of having butterflies in my stomach. But this is just so wrong.

"Why won't you look at me?" He asked.

I stopped for a while but then I continued what I was doing.

"Look at me, please."

I was surprised when I heard his voice behind me.

"What do you want?" I said as I stood up.

"Wait, are you okay? You seem to be not in your mood." He said, looking at me concerningly. "If you have problems, just tell me. I'm always here for you and you know that."

"Keep doing this and I might really fall in love with you."

Oh shit. What's wrong with me? Did I just tell my thoughts aloud?!

Junkyu suddenly blushed and had a tiny smile on his face. "Are you really going home now? Do you want to eat with me somewhere?"

Argh! Did he just pretend that he didn't hear what I said?

"Didn't you hear what I said?" I raised my brow.

"I did." He replied.

"Why are you still talking like that then?"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"The way you talk. It's making me feel things that I shouldn't feel."

"Oookay. And what about it?"

I bit my lip out of frustration. It seems like he just want to hear me saying it directly.

"I want to say that... you should stop talking like that." I said and turned around.

What I did I just say?

"What if I don't want to?" He teased. "Well, I could change the way I talk just like you wanted me to. But I can't change this because this is really how I express what I feel."

"Stop talking to me then."

"Why the hell would I do that?" He said. "It's odd but this feels familiar. I suddenly remembered that time before the exam when I went to the library but then you wanted me to study somewhere else. You were shoving me off."

"Why are you bringing that back?"

"Because I still don't know the reason."

"I don't have any plans telling you anyway." I said. "Could you please move? You're blocking the way."

He shook his head. "I'll move if you'll tell me why."

"You're crazy."

"I know." He admitted.

He then sang the song 'tell me' by wonder girls. This guy, really.

"It's because you were annoying. Are you fine now?"

"Is that all?"

"Yes, what more do you want me to say?" I said.

He sighed. "You know what, I couldn't think straight that day. I kept thinking why are you avoiding me."

He paused for a while, then said, "I can't stop thinking about you after that."

"Here you go again making things complicated. Don't bother me and go to your girlfriend instead."

I was about to leave but he suddenly spoke.

"We broke up." Junkyu truthfully said.

"What?"

"You heard it right."

I didn't know what to say after that. I really thought he and that girl from the other class are still together.

"I told you the truth. Now it's your turn."

"What truth are you saying?" I asked, confused.

"I know that your reason was a lie. It's not because I was annoying. I know that there's something you wanted to say."

Damn, how did he know?

"It's because..."

Should I tell him already?

"I like you."

There was a moment of silence and we stared at each other for a few seconds.

"Took you long enough."