toxic love | mattia polibio

♕ T H I R T E E N ♕

"Hey darling, I missed you," Lucas says as I at strap myself into the helicopter seat beside him.

"Just shut up and fly," I grumble.

"I heard this job went as expected, you should be happy," he says trying to cheer me up.

"I said shut up," my eyes begin to tear up and I look up at the roof to prevent them from falling.

"You're practically Donna now, I'm proud of you Vera—you should be too," he persists.

"LUCAS I SAID SHUT UP!" I yell at him and the tears begin to flow freely.

Shit.

"You caught feelings didn't you?" Lucas laughs.

"No, I didn't," I scoff.

"Damn. You caught feelings for a Polibio! Your dad is gonna love this story," Lucas laughs.

"You're not telling him," I say sternly.

"I was just messing with you, I'm sorry for your loss though," he gives me a small, sad smile.

"I guess feelings aren't allowed in this line of work," I choke on a laugh.

"No, no they're not. Vera, please don't let this happen again—it's toxic. You're gonna lose yourself if you catch feelings again," he says in a really low voice.

"I think I already did. Mattia's gone because I killed him and I'm never getting him back," I'm sobbing again.

"Vera stop. Vera, this is toxic. Please, you're breaking my heart," Lucas pleads.

I ignore him.

"He died because of me. I killed him. I killed the only person I've ever loved," I continue.

"Vera..." Lucas tries to reason with me but I drown out his pleads and I absorb myself into my head.

3 months later... (haha it's not a big skip don't worry. you'll see why i did this)

"Vera, it's been three months... You need to forget about him..." Lucas begins to complain as I pull out a bottle of Scotch.

"Shut up," I grumble and I pour myself three fingers.

"You wanna be shit faced drunk or something?" Lucas asks irritated.

"Lucas, I swear to God I will shoot you if you don't shut up. I'm trying to get drunk as soon as possible—why are you even here?," I ask.

"We're interrupting a delivery to another gang tonight," Lucas says.

"Congratulations," I say in a sarcastic voice.

"No, Vera... It's the Polibios— we're interrupting their delivery," he says suddenly and I accidentally knock over my drink onto the tile.

"WHY DO YOU MENTION HIS NAME? HUH? YOU JUST LOVE TO SEE ME CRY DON'T YOU?" I yell at him.

"No, it's a very sensitive delivery and we need you there to monitor because this only happens once a year," Lucas explains.

"Can I kill more people?" I ask with a grin.

"Mamas, you can kill as many as you want—you're Donna," he smiles at me.

I pretend to gag, "Don't call me that name—I hate it," I reply and I grab a couple paper towels to clean the floor with.

"So, you're coming?" he asks almost buoyant.

"Yes, I'm coming—whoever is now leading isn't leaving without a fight. Mattia was supposed to lead and no one can take his spot," I say aggressively.