Seeking SOMNUS

42.

THEO

Erick was on his way to my place for our usual meet ups. I successfully maintain to act normal when she was here, although it was exceptionally hard for me. I should've said something. Something more. I should've asked her to let me visit. Should've done something better for her. But I stood there dumbfounded, greeted her with tacky peachy condolences.

I was dumb.

"Are you out of your mind?" Erick blurted out as soon as he arrived.

"What? I can't invade her privacy and strictly can't go against her choices and decisions." I implemented in my defense.

"What! Are you, government services– just desperately looking for excuses to avoid putting efforts. Avoid working on your problems." He was furious more than ever.

"I understand, you respect her choices, her humble request for you not to go there. She is trying to push you away because that's what you did priory in the first place. Although you have thick hardcore reason behind that. So put efforts, fight for it. Demand for your chance to explain yourself. Above all fight for her. No matter how hard she push you away, you make your way back to her. You prove her she's not alone and you don't fake it but actually truly cares. This is what true friends do." Erick bellowed in one breath, it took me by surprise too. I hated it now when he sounded legit in every other conversations we had. How did he become this witty overnight?

"I-uh... I don't know if this is really a good idea." Nevertheless I agreed with him, I yet not believed in myself if I could do it or not.

"You are a big big moron!" He groaned.

"Theo, mate, you know how to fight for someone you care about. Did you care about Bailey to that extent when you actually about to give your life up for him. I don't know if you did, but you helped George, a complete stranger, just to save someone's life. Here you just have to save your friendship. It isn't that difficult thing to do. Just walked out of the house, and drive off to the memorial. That's it." He tried to keep his calm, yet his words were coming out through cleansed teeth.

"I don't care, if she wants to listen what really happened, if she wants to just blame me for forever, I just want to stuck by her side in the moments like these. Moments where she might feel lost, she might feel alone utmost. I can't leave her in vain. But but... I don't.. I don't know where to go. This city must have enough cemeteries. The ceremony must have been started already and we can't go out there looking at all cemeteries one by one." I accepted my inner voice. Erick's words were eye-opening and I couldn't stay back. Not today. But I also had no clue where to go.

"That, I've solved. Don't ask me how. Just come with me." Erick instantaneously replied, locking the door behind and he started the ignition to our destination.

"How'd you know?" I asked through my curiosity.

"I'll tell you later." He dropped the topic. And I didn't cross-questioned, I had bigger things to be concerned about.

*Saint Tropez Orthodox Church and Cemetery.*

We arrived finally at our destination. It was half passed six in the evening and wind had the chills and fog swirling around in itself.

I hopped out of car in total rush, and the thick foggy winds knocked the air out of my lungs. But my heart was still thundered inside my ribcage. The ground beneath my feet felt like swallowing me and I was running crazily where the lights were coming from.

I slowed my pace when I saw her just there. Standing on the stage, main lights were at her and she slowly looked up. My breathing stopped and my legs along with it. I stood there at the very back, when her eyes met mine. My legs rooted to ground, and my numb body waved with all the strength it have. She smiled as the tear glistening in her eyes.