Life is beautiful (A muslim story )

chapter-22-The ugly truth.

Be the flower that gives its fragrance to even the hand that crushes it - Hazrath Ali (R.A).

SHIRAZ's POV

Entering the third year of medical school I was changing colours.In my 21st year of life, I was feeling emotions like never before.For a greater part of my life I was this carefree guy who didn't care much about sentiments.With time and experiences i have realised that everyone in this world is fighting their conscience, the darker side of humans.Strange emotions which were harboured perfectly within my limbic system until now,revealed themselves in different shades clouding my heart.I had no clue that Allah had put in a millions of sentiments in a human heart.I think many a times we dont understand them until we feel them ourselves.

Last week when I went to meet granny she wasn't home and grandpa told me about her being invited to Sanam's engagement.I was bewildered and there was this wierd feeling welling inside me, an undescribable one.It was not every day that you hear someone in a medical school getting married or engaged.I knew Sanam was not a girl who would not publicly announce her engagement but the disappointment was Mikael didn't tell me either.Lately, he was busy juggling between university and his father's business.I don't even remember when I last had a proper talk with him.Our only meetings were at the common mosque where we pray Friday salah.

I totally respected Sanam's privacy yet I felt Dr.Younus was not a match for her.Sanam was a sensitive and an intelligent girl who wouldn't look good with an arrogant, sassy doctor.I have heard that he was a workaholic who cared about nothing but his career.I wanted to have a talk with Mikael but dropped the idea thinking he might be busy with the preparations.I was quite disturbed,curious and at the same time irritated by the news. My mind stopped working and even my assignments were interrupted.I knew I shouldn't be thinking about her in any form, shaitaan kept giving me excuses in the form of intent.For a long time I have been working on being kinder to that wrong headed version of myself that I berate, so that I accept it's a part of me.I just need to learn how to keep it under control.

The next day at medical school, I accidentally met Sanam in my community medicine posting, when I mistook her for some girl who was stalking me.I hardly expected her to come on the next day of her engagement party.What boggled me was she looked disturbed, like she was trying to put on a happy face though she wasn't.I didn't talk much with her as we were alone in the street and the third person would be shaitaan.She lost her way and I acted as her guide, helping her as a fellow muslim.Going against Allah's orders was something I would be away from until my last breath.

*****

It was Friday, the next day after our little meeting that I spotted her in the library.With a coffee cup,she was on the same table where I sat after the clinics.Library was unusually crowded that day, leaving me no choice but to share the same table with her.That moment I thought I could congratulate her on getting engaged, she was my class fellow and one of my best friend's sister.After convincing my inner self, I ambled straight to the table where she was sitting with her head slightly bowed and her eyes never leaving the book.

"Assalamualaikum! Do you mind if I sit here?" I asked, placing my heavy backpack onto the table.

"Walaikumsalam!" Sanam replied and continued her book staring activity.That gave me a hint that she wasn't in a good mood and I needed to be careful.

She got up minutes later and strolled towards the librarian's desk.I followed behind as I needed some reference book too.Coincidentally,we asked for the same book at the same time.Before I could say something, she handed me the book and walked out of the library leaving few of her belongings behind.I didn't go after her for I felt her swift action depicted her mindset, she wanted to be alone.I longed to know the reason for her strange behaviour.My mind was telling me that perhaps something was wrong with her engagement.I felt it was appropriate to ask Mikael rather than directly asking Sanam a personal question.