distance🖤 - mattia polibio

"i love him too"

TIME SKIP- 3 DAYS- WE'VE BEEN STAYING AT KAI'S FOR 2 NIGHTS AND WE HAVEN'T SPOKEN TO MATTIA AT ALL

i miss him so fucking much. i'm still mad because i have no idea what made him do it but i know he's not okay either. Kai and ale went to talk to him yesterday but he was a mess. I got up this morning and decided to go back home because i didn't wanna keep intruding kai and jemmas time because me and mattia had a fight. I only had my phone and keys with me so i was sharing clothes with jemma. i hadn't really slept properly either because all night i was wondering what he was doing and if he was okay. i went down and saw kai and jemma watching tv together and they smiled when they saw me. 

"hey you okay?" jem asked and i nodded.

"thank you for letting me stay here and cry for almost 3 days. i'm gonna go back today and see if he's any better" i sighed.

"he really loves you y/n. he always tells us that he's so madly in love with you and can't wait to see you when he gets home. he's going through stuff and he finds it hard to open up to people , just please be patient with him" kai sd gently and i'd be lying if i said that didn't make my heart melt. 

"of course i will. i love him so much more than he knows. i'll talk to you guys later , love you" i said and they gave me a hug.

"love you too and good luck" they said and i smiled and left. it was almost 6pm because i'd be laying in bed overthinking all day. 

i got to the house and fumbled around for my keys and eventually found them and took a deep breath before unlocking the door and making my way up to our room. the door was half open so i walked in and there he was. he was alseep , with his back against the wall and dried tears stains on his cheeks. he was in the same clothes from that night and he smelt not too good. there was no fresh smell of weed so he hadn't done it since that night. i crouched next to him and looked at him for a minute. he was a mess but i wanted nothing more than to just fall into his arms , but i didn't. i shook him gently and his opened after a few minutes and he sat up straight when he saw me.

"y/n i'm sorry i-"

"shh, let's get you cleaned up" he was about to ramble but i interrupted because i didn't want us to talk about it yet , kai told me there was something mattia hadn't told me about so i wanted him to be comfortable and properly awake for when he did.

i helped him up from the floor and took him into the bathroom. i sat him down on the stool and took of his t- shirt and threw it in the laundry basket. i took out his shaving stuff and made him wash his face. he listened and sat back down. he had a little bit of stubble so i fixed it while he watched in silence. after i was finished i rinsed out his hair and shampooed it and then washed it out. after that was done he looked up at me.

"thank you" he said quietly and i just nodded and went to take out clothes for him and then i came back and gave them to him and he went to shower. i took my own clothes and then took a shower in the other bathroom.

me: