i woke up and looked over and mattia wasn't there. i rubbed my eyes and went on my phone for a bit before brushing my teeth and showering. i got changed into this:
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i came out the bathroom and i still hadn't seen mattia so i just assumed he had gone out somewhere so i shrugged it off and started to sort out some of my stuff for packing. around 3pm i still hadn't heard from mattia and i was leaving to go to our apartment to open the door for the furniture delivery. no one else was home so i just left and made my way there.
i got to the apartment and after 5 minutes the delivery guys came and bought in the furniture boxes. after they bought it all in i sat down and texted mattia and told him i was here and i was gonna wait for him so we could build the stuff together. he didn't reply so i started building the side tables , to distract myself. once they were done i looked at my phone again.
i still hadn't got a reply so i was confused. then i saw the date. fuck.
i quickly grabbed my keys and bag and ran out the door and got in my car and drove to the place i thought he'd be.
i got to the cliff and got out the car and there he was , sitting on the edge. he was facing the other way so i couldn't see his face but a certain smell wafted through the air and my nose wrinkled when i smelt it. i sighed and walked over and sat down next to him.
"mattia" i said gently as i looked at him.
red eyes. tear stained cheeks. smell of weed. my heart broke seeing him like this again.
"give it" i said , reaching for his blunt.
"no , just go back home" he said moving it away from me.
"mattia , i know you're hurting but this isn't gonna help you" i said trying to take it but he got up and moved a few feet away. so i also got up and moved next to him.
"y/n just go home please. i'm fine"
"i'm not leaving you alone again"
"i don't need you. i don't need anyone , i just need him and he's not here so leave me alone" he said harshly and i felt like he'd just ripped a little part of my heart.
i looked up at him with tears forming in my eyes as he took another hit. as he raised it to his lips i grabbed it out of his hand and threw it off the cliff. (don't litter btw)
"what the fuck!" he said , annoyed as he looked at me.
"you don't need it" i said , crossing my legs and looking back at him.
"can you just leave! i don't want you here , just leave me alone" he said , raising his voice a little but it didn't faze me. i know he's hurting and not thinking clearly , this isn't really him. this broken mattia. the mattia who wants one person with him and one person only. and that person isn't here.
