i woke up around 10am and sat in bed on my phone for a little while. mattia's mum told us her and his dad were going christmas shopping so it was just us home. i went to get out of bed and felt a sharp pain in my lower stomach. i sighed and walked into the bathroom and i had got my period. i cleaned up and stuff and changed into this but with a hoodie on top because i felt bloated already:
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after i put on the matching astroworld hoodie that came with the sweatpants i put my hair up in a messy bun because i couldn't be bothered to do it properly.
jade had texted asking how i was so i replied to her and jem messaged asking how things were. no one knew about yesterday. i'll explain it to her when i have more energy. i put my phone down and i was about to leave my room to go to the kitchen before i heard a knock on my door.
i took a deep breath and opened it. mattia was leaning against the door frame and i looked up at him.
"i know you're upset but i'm pretty sure you think it is something that it isn't and i need us to talk about it because i hate when your mad at me" he said quickly.
"fine" i said and he took my arm and walked me to his room.
we walked in and sat on the bed. the last time we were both in here we were still dating and we were telling each other that we'd be fine in college. lol.
i looked at him and he looked at me.
"why didn't you tell me?" i asked and he looked confused.
"tell you what?"
"that you stopped loving me"
"wtf are you talking about , i haven't stopped!" he said, sitting upright.
"but i thought-"
"you thought i could stop loving you that quickly and easily? have you not understood any of the promises i keep reminding you of" he said , annoyed , which made me mad too.
"i literally walked in on you fucking her mattia"
"that didn't mean anything to me! i was literally just horny and so was she"
"you're telling me you don't have feelings for her?"
"of course i dont y/n wtf"
"but you fucked her! you know she's in love with you and you fucked her!"
"so? you knew jaden was in love with you but you kissed him" he said and that made me another level of pissed.
"I KISSED HIM FOR A GAME AND YOU KNOW THAT. you got so upset about it but then did the same thing but instead of kissing her you fucked her!" i shouted and he shut up.
"and you can't keep bringing up jaden because kissing and fucking are two different things!" i continued.
"i have no feelings for her , it just happened in the moment that's it" he said.
