The Life of a Cat

10. About doves and a sunny chair

It seems like every Sun something happens with Sweetie around. Weird.

This Sun, Mike invited his friend Felix over. And Felix actually came. Ugh. I actually dared to hope that he would refuse.

So Felix came over. He knocked at the door and Mike answered. They put their arms around each other (I really want to know why, it seems like such a common thing to do) and Felix walked in. First, he saw me. He asked Mike "Now, is that the Cat you told me about?"

Nope, of course I'm Sweetie. Can't you see?

Mike looked very offended that Felix looked at me first and answered "Yes. Sweetie is that little dog over there."

Felix went to see Sweetie and cooed "Oh is that a good dog! Oh what a cute little dog! Oh yes you like it when I pet you don't you? Oh yes you're so sweet!"

How can humans lower themselves to talk like that? A cat would never ever do that!

Then Felix went back to me. I feel very honoured to see that you deign to talk to me, sir Felix.

And you know what he did? HE PATTED ME ON THE HEAD. He patted me on the head.

Do you realize what that means? He PATTED ME ON THE HEAD.

I hissed at him. He patted me some more. Ugh.

Then, Mike decided it was time for him to get Felix on the "against The Cat and for Sweetie" team. They both went to the "upstairs" of the house and of course, Sweetie decided to come annoy me.

I was sitting comfortably on my beautiful sunny chair when Sweetie came over and growled gently at me. I scratched his nose. Sweetie took his paw and swiped it over my head. I scratched his paw. Sweetie yowled and limped away. I meowed for victory.

Another one bites the dust.

Then I decided to go look for some fish in the cold box. There was a whole sheet of smoked salmon. Very yummy. But just as I wanted to grab it, Sweetie pushed the whole plate on the floor and ran away. Dad had heard the sound and came running. Sadly, I was the only one left and Dad, obviously, thought I was the one who had broken the plate. I meowed loudly but he didn't believe me.

Felix came back down and saw me. He said "oh hello Cat". I hissed at him. And he said "Ok, you don't want me to talk to you? That's ok, I'll come back later."

Wow. That's very nice of him. He is temporarily in the "nice" zone.

Sweetie came and barked loudly to get Felix's attention. Felix came over to him, quickly patted him on the head and went back "upstairs".

Hey! That's not nice! Sweetie, I'm the only one that Felix likes!

Wait wait wait what did I just say? No, no, no, no, I absolutely do not want Felix to like me. No, not at all. Back off Felix. I don't want you as my friend. Or maybe I do? I don't know.

Sweetie obviously decided it would be a good time to plead for my friendship. He licked me and then threw himself on the floor with all four paws in the air. Sweetie is seriously ignorant. Lying on the back means surrendering, because the enemy can easily kill you off and you can't fight back with your paws in the air. But Sweetie waved his paws and, when I jumped on his belly and scratched him to fight, he gave me a big swish with his tongue.

Mike came running and scolded me for "fighting when Sweetie only wanted to play". Lying on the back means surrendering, Mike. I thought you would know that. But obviously you're too stupid.

Felix, following Mike, came back down and saw Sweetie lying on his back with me trying to fight with him. Mike told him what he thought of the situation "Sweetie, very nice of him, wanted to play when the Cat decided it would be good to attack him. See, Sweetie has a big scratch too."

For your information, the scratch wasn't big. It wasn't even bleeding.

Felix, though, told Mike "Well, do you know that for cats lying on the back means surrendering? Maybe Sweetie only wanted to play but the Cat certainly does not deserve a scolding. Cats need to fight in their lives."

Thank you Felix. From now on, you are my best friend.

"And also," Felix continued, "I don't think that the Cat is as mean as you said. I think he simply needs some affection. I don't know why you say that Sweetie is nice and the Cat isn't. The Cat has every right to be annoyed by Sweetie. If he doesn't want to be friends with Sweetie, that's his problem. Sweetie seems like a very nice dog BUT he doesn't have character. The Cat has character and a strong personality that is currently pointing towards the negative side. With a little bit more understanding, tolerance, and friends he could become someone very nice in a couple of weeks. That's my advice. If you don't want it, fine, that's your problem. But I think every single word that I said. I would be very sad if this broke our friendship Mike. I really hope we can learn from one another's opinions."

Felix, you are my best friend forever and ever. You literally just said what I wanted to say.

Wait did I just say that? Did I?

Well, I mean it.

For the rest of the Sun, Felix, Mike, me, and Sweetie (even though Mike didn't want to, Felix convinced him) played Cat-the-scotch. Weirdly enough, Felix knew that game and explained it to everybody. And Mike actually enjoyed it. But I still don't like him because he likes Sweetie more than he likes me. That's enough reason for not liking him.

I'll see you when something else happened. Probably tomorrow. With Sweetie in the house, something happens every Sun.

***

This chapter is for Tfiosamitymockingjay because of her sweet comments and the facts that she actually answers my questions! Not that she's the only one.