Olivia
I've woken up fairly early for a Saturday, it's only half 8 and I'm not going round to Katie's till 12 so I just lie in bed on my phone. Van still hasn't replied to my message from last night, he probably just went out and then had a late night, I know that was one of their biggest gigs so it wouldn't shock me. I just do my usual scroll through Twitter and Instagram and every once and I while I stalk some of the very few Catfish and The Bottlemen fan accounts because there's not many and it's cute seeing how nice their fan base are. We decided to keep our relationship private, just because that will be all people ask him about instead of stuff about their music. Besides, all the girls who are obsessed with Van will probably just give me hate, although their fans seem to be quite kind you just can't be sure. I understood though, I'd be gutted if one of my celebrity crushes got a girlfriend, although my biggest celebrity crush right now was my boyfriend.
I'm just lying there scrolling through #CatfishAndTheBottlemen, #VanMcann and all the other related hashtags, just cause I like seeing photos of them enjoying themselves and all the videos of them live. Until I come across a post I wish I didn't see. "Van Mcann chatting up an Italian model in a bar after their gig👀👀" is the caption and the photos are of Van and a tall blonde lady, she's so tanned and has the most amazing legs, sporting a red dress which shows off her figure very well, she's the complete opposite of me. Van's smiling at her politely in the first picture so I don't get ahead of myself, but the more I scroll the worse it gets. They just get closer together and you can see exactly where he's looking, her hands even on his thigh in one picture and in the last one Vans waving goodbye with an arm wrapped around Bondys shoulder.
An Italian model. Long blonde hair, long tanned legs, an amazing pair of tits and a beautiful red dress that showed off her figure. The total opposite of me, in fact we're literally exact opposites. I try and tell myself it's nothing but the more I look at it the worse it gets. They're not just looking at each other in a friendly way, she's giving them the eyes and he's got that smirk on his face he always gives me when he's in the mood. They were sitting literally inches apart and they didn't start off that close.
My heart has sunken to my stomach and I'm just lying staring at the roof, drowning in my own thoughts. I could text him but he's not even replied to my message from last night so I'll leave it. If I don't get in the shower now I'll be late round to Katie's and she's made lunch, normally I'd listen to music in the shower but I wasn't feeling it. I don't even feel like wearing makeup so I just dry my hair and put on a pair of jeans.
Maybe he's sick of me. I'd understand. A boyfriend would normally have to worry about their girlfriend missing them but Van was worrying about me eating and drinking water, stuff that a normal human should do naturally. He knows that I'm better now but he'll still worry about it and he's probably sick of feeling like I'm his responsibility. That girls physically the opposite of me and she's probably so much easier than I am. I'm not going to start hating a girl I don't even know though, she wouldn't have known about me, Van however....
Please let their be a good explanation as to why Van was looking at her like no other person mattered. What if he only brings it up because he knows he's been caught, this could've happened so many other times, there's just no pictures. The lady from the pictures could be someone vans seen before and in the photos they're sitting really close and smiling at each other so I can't even imagine what's going on behind the camera.
It's half 11 now, meaning it's half 12 in Italy so Vans definitely awake. They were leaving at twelve to go to France and there's no way he'd be allowed to sleep in. He's definitely awake but he's still not replied to my text from last night asking if he was mad at me. That's probably why he started talking to that model, he probably realised he deserves better and he'll just ignore me until I bring it up. What do I even say to him? I need to go to Katie's but when I get home I think I'll have to speak to him, it's doing my head in.
"Heyyy gorgeous!" I say, stepping into Katie's kitchen as Emily runs towards me with open arms.
"Where's Van?" Emily's delicate voice asks.
"He's still on holiday darling, singing to lots of people" Hearing his name from Emily's mouth makes me panic.
If he is sick of me he'll probably end things with me and Emily's going to miss him. I'll miss seeing them together, he's so good with kids. To think there was a point where we'd picture our first born and discuss names made me realise how in love with him I was and he probably didn't feel the same anymore. Long distance can either make you realise how in love you are or that the person you think you're in love with isn't actually someone you're properly in love with. I've realised that I'm in love with Van and he's the person I want to spend my life with no matter what but I dread to think how he feels.
"You alright Liv? Gone off into a day dream" Katie says, closing the oven door shut with her foot. "You're missing Van thats what it is."
"Yeah, that's it" I smile back politely.
