5SOS Imagines

Michael (Part 1/2)

(Author's Note: So this is a little writing project I did with AlejandraNFuentes! Hope you guys like it and keep your eye out for the second part of it!)

For six months.

I'd known for six months he would be leaving and each passing day didn't make the thought any easier. It wasn't a conversation neither of us liked to have, it was a must have and it became a must a month ago. It was his life, his career and I knew that but what about my life? My career?

I knew he would love it if I packed up and left with him but I just couldn't drop everything and go after him. What about my family? Who would tend to the apartment we had both got not even 10 months ago...

But there was a part of me that was blinded. A part that wondered about other things… What about our relationship? Would the two of us make it? What if he found somebody else? What if the two of us grew apart…?

I hated that part of my thoughts but it was as much a part of me as all the other thoughts. And I was sure he thought about it all as well.

And now six months later, I watched him as he packed up all of his bags. I watched as one by one they piled by the front door. I watched as they were packed into the back of our car. I drove by his side to the airport, his hand holding mine tightly as the world around the two of us blurred during the ride.

“It’ll be over before you know it.” He murmured; his words soft as the last few minutes together slipped between the two of us like sand between your fingers.

“I know…” I whispered; my voice so small as I squeezed his fingers a little tighter. Afraid he would disappear right there and then. But neither of us said anything else, the air was too thick with emotions. Emotions that were both good and bad. So many mixed feelings.

I still remembered very clearly the day I had found out about it all. Those words still echoed in my head, a representation of all my fears.

That night, I felt the front door open before his familiar tall figure walked over to me. I remembered the way his warm body had embraced my cold one. He kissed my forehead and looked around the decorated dining room, the candles making it romantic, the fancy plating out in the table and the amazing almost chef looking dinner.

“I guess you babe good news too.” His hands traveled to mine and kissed them lightly.

“We have a tour, like a big tour. All over the states, all over the world baby. We made it!” Tour, he was leaving for tour. My stomach had dropped, a chill running all over my body at his huge news.

“What about us?” I stuttered the words softly, my eyes huge as they looked at him. It wouldn’t work. It won’t ever work, not with his career.  Not with mine…

“You can come with me babe.” He had said. The option so simple, so full of possibilities. Then why had I thought it was so terrifying. I shook my head and stood up, walking to the other room.

“I got the promotion for my job; I just can’t leave all of that. It’s what I’ve been working for since I moved here.” He chuckled and just followed me. Did he think this was all a joke?

“I gave up things for you, why can’t you do this?” How could he be so selfish.  

“I never asked you to do that! You did that yourself!” The anger on my tone got even louder when I saw him roll his eyes and walk away from me. “I’m not giving up my life for you!”

“Then don’t! I’ll leave, you enjoy your life being whatever the fuck you are and I’ll be surrounded by thousand of girls who really want to be with me.” The anger in his eyes was all I could see and mine suddenly began to tear up.

“Go ahead, be with those shallow girls. I won’t be yours anymore. I won’t be waiting this time!” I turned my back on him and headed to the bedroom. I heard him sigh and mumbled a few words.

What I had expected to be a romantic and exciting night, turned out to be an endless night of fighting. We’d never had fights quite like this one before…

It had taken the two of us about two hours to calm down and still it had been him the one had walked back into the bedroom and sat down next to me. His hands had gently grabbed my waist and pulled me onto his lap, bringing me closer to him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean those things.”He murmured softly into the crook of my neck. His mouth softly brushing against my cool skin, instantly warming me up.

“Well I did, I won’t leave my work. I just can’t.” I murmured.  

“I understand baby, we can make it work.” And that had been the end of it. We had avoided the topic for six months. No more arguments, even though when the conversations came they had been tensed. But we never fought about it again.

Now I watched him wave at me from the airport security, his smile big as if trying to make all of my fears vanish. The fears never would though. Would he find someone better? Someone willing to give up everything for him? Would we not find the time?

And just like that, I couldn’t see him anymore. Michael was gone… My heart gone along with him.