Red vs Blue: Heavy 'META'L

Well Hello

At Valhalla, Donut is running around cleaning Blue Base, humming and singing to himself. South is in the other room, napping.

Donut: Man, Caboose sure can make a mess for just one person. Although, I guess he was trying to make another person, which technically would make this a mess for two people. I think Caboose would be a great dad. I wonder if I should have a kid? I never really thought I wanted one. But as I get older, I start to think something is missing. Aw, I hope I didn't wait too long. I've been so focused on my career and having a good time, maybe it's too late for me! Oh great, now I sound like my mother!

A soldier in white armor walks into the base, sneaking behind Donut and towering over him. Donut turns around and notices the person behind him.

Donut: Oh, hi there! You scared me! I didn't know anyone was over here at Blue Base.

The soldier doesn't reply.

Donut: Strong silent type, huh? That's cool. Don't mind me, I'm just keeping the base a little tidy.

The soldier still says nothing.

Donut: Yeah, a clean base is a deadly base. That's what Sarge always says. Sarge is our commander. You'll get a sarge over here I'm sure, but he won't be like our Sarge; he'll be Blue!

The soldier takes a step forward, revealing his helmet to be an EVA helmet. The Meta continues to stare down at Donut as he continues.

Donut: Man, the rest of the guys will be so happy to have someone to fight. They're gonna be so relieved to see you! What did you say your name was?

The Meta growls.

Donut: Hm. Foreign, huh? Love the accent. Really works for you. (The Meta pulls out a pistol and aims it at Donut's head) I should probably move this...

Donut ducks in time to dodge the Meta's shot. He gets back up.

Donut: Aw, don't worry buddy! I already checked their weapons. All good. But thanks for helpin'!

The Meta growls again, puts away his pistol, and takes out his Brute Shot. Donut turns back around and attempts to lift the body beside him.

Donut: Ugh! This thing's heavy! Maybe if I grab the legs...

Donut moves to the side and obliviously avoids the Meta's strike, which conveniently knocks the body to the wall.

Donut: Well! That was helpful, thanks! Where'd you get that kickass broom?

The Meta approaches Donut, growling as he aims his Brute Shot at him. Motor noises come from outside the base.

Donut: Uh... do you hear that?

Simmons: (from outside) Hey, Donut! Are you in there? Lopez built you a motorcycle! It's broken.

Donut: Hey! Yeah, Simmons! I'm inside the Blue Base! Guess what? Blue Team got a new soldier!

Simmons: What? They sent another team member? (approaches the base's entrance) Why would they do that? That doesn't make any sense.

Simmons then sees the Meta inside.

Simmons: OH, FUCK! (quickly darts off) Welcometotheneighborhood, seeyoulater!

South walks down the hall, yawning and fully armored.

South: Hey, what's with all the-

South freezes as she sees the Meta still aiming his weapon at Donut. The pink soldier than waves at her.