Red vs Blue: Heavy 'META'L

Battle of the Exes

At the desert, the Meta, Doc and Wash are standing over the Epsilon unit. The Meta growls at Washington.

Washington: Don't get excited, it's empty.

Doc: What is it?

Washington: This is the Epsilon unit.

Doc: This is what you've been looking for?

Washington: Yes.

Doc: Not what I was expecting. I mean I like the colour, but other than that, nihh...

Washington: Clearly they transferred Epsilon into that floating thing we saw.

Doc: You saw a floating thing?

Washington: Yes, like a metal eye. It shot a laser at us.

Doc: Yeah, okay. Hey Wash, this sun is really hot, maybe we should find you some shade.

Washington: I'm not hallucinating, Meta saw it too.

The Meta growls, shrugging his shoulders.

Washington: Oh yes you did! Don't even try that.

Doc: Wash, do you see the floating eyeball now? Is he here with us?

Washington: Don't psychoanalyze me.

Doc: I'd like to talk to the laser eye for a minute, Wash.

Washington: Shut up. Meta, let's convert this to a recovery unit. But be careful, this thing looks like it's in bad shape.

The Meta growls and nods before walking over to the Epsilon unit and starts working on it.

Doc: What's he doing?

Washington: This is a storage unit, but we're trained to modify them. We can change a storage unit into a capture unit. That way, the next time we see Epsilon, he won't get away.

Doc: Are you talking about the regular Epsilon, or the Epsilon who's just a floating head and visits you when you're alone.

Washington: I'm not crazy. And it was just the eye that was floating around, not a whole head.

Doc: Yes Wash, because the whole head is what makes it crazy.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Back at the facility, the Reds and Blues are standing over Tex's body on the floor.

Epsilon: I'm waking her up.

Sarge: No way buddy. You must have missed the smashfest we just went through. I ain't repeating that.

Epsilon: Hey, we made a deal: I unlock you, you have to help me with her.

Grif: Hey, now hold on a second.

Simmons: This affects the entire group. I say we put it to a vote. All those in favor of waking her up and letting her kill us, say Aye.

Kan: Aye.

Slade: Aye.

Sarge: 'The hell do you two think you're doing?

Slade: Waking her up. Sarge, she only went berserk because she'd seen this kind of place before. And it wasn't a good experience for her.

Sarge: Corporal, I order you to say 'Nay'.