Restraining Orders

1.3K 43 8
                                    

Slade has Tex in a Nelson lock as she tries to break out of his grip.

Slade: (struggling to hold her in place) Are you lot gonna help me with her or what?!

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

Slade: (struggling to hold her in place) Are you lot gonna help me with her or what?!

Sarge: Naw buddy I think you got everything under control. We'll just hang back here.

Epsilon: Yeah, at first I wanted to get involved, but I just got a new body, sooooo...

Grif: Yeah, you've got some catching up to do.

Sarge: (notices Epsilon's Monitor body on the ground) Hey, what's that there?

Simmons: I think that's Church's old body.

Sarge: You mean he ain't a floatin' cue ball any more? That's too bad. Had a few more nicknames in my side pocket. We'll certainly miss you Lord Hackensack of the Roundalots.

Epsilon: I'm standing right here, ya know?

Grif: Yeah, that's why were saying it.

Caboose: Uh-hu- we have to do something.

F.I.L.S.S.: I am sorry, as I said, I cannot operate outside the bounds of my standard safety protocols.

Caboose: What if I said... pretty please?

Theta: I don't think manners has anything to do with it, Caboose.

F.I.L.S.S.: Private Caboose, is there a reason why you don't want to use one of the standard safety protocols? In this scenario, I would strongly recommend locking down the armor of any rogue unit.

Caboose: Wait you can do that?

F.I.L.S.S.: Of course. Armor lock is a standard safety feature since the Freelancer break in.

Caboose: Well why didn't you tell us that?

F.I.L.S.S.: Why would I need to tell the Director that? He wrote the protocol himself.

Caboose: Oh, right. Yes of course he did. Um Sheila, could you do the armor lunchable thing that you said?

South: (eyes widen) No, no, wait! Caboose, don't-!

F.I.L.S.S.: Certainly. (ding dong) Now initiating standard safety protocol. Armor lockdown in progress. All units, stand by for lockdown.

Slade immediately lets go of Tex as he gets shocked from her armor-lock and watches her become immobilized.

Slade: YEOW! What the-?!

Epsilon: What- what's happening? Caboose what did you do to her?

Caboose: Yes! Yes! I did it! I am the biggest hero ever! I beat up a girl!

Red vs Blue: Heavy 'META'LWhere stories live. Discover now