𝗠𝗖𝗬𝗧 𝗫 𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗘𝗥 | ᵒⁿᵉˢʰᵒᵗˢ

ʰᵒᵗᵉˡ ᶜᵉⁱˡⁱⁿᵍ

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summary: based off the song hotel ceiling by rixton  (now called pushbaby)

warnings: mentions of drinking and heartbreak

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"it was easy to find another for your bed."

you and Clay your long term boyfriend of three years had broken up a few days ago. the two of you had met in grade school but didn't start dating till your senior year of high school. you thought you were gonna last, you were madly in love with each other at least that's what you thought until Clay told you that he was losing feelings and wanted to end things before anyone got hurt.

you had no choice but to let him go. you weren't gonna trap him in a relationship he was unhappy in, he deserved better. within a few weeks he had a new girlfriend or so you assumed. you saw him with a girl he told you that was only a friend and you trusted him but now you didn't know what to believe.

"how does it feel to leave me this way. when all that you have's been lost in a day?"

did he think of how bad you would hurt? did he not know how much you'd miss him? your whole world fell apart. the two of you moved out into your own apartment together. he was there when you got your college acceptance letter, when your grandpa died, and many other moments. he was your rock and now that he was gone you didn't know what to do.

"i've been staring at the hotel ceiling, drinking everything I've found this evening. trying to hold on to the sweetest feeling, so i'll never never let you go, don't you leave me lonely now."

packing a quick bag of clothes you left that same night. you were in a hotel room about thirty minutes from the apartment the of you shared. or once shared he texted you earlier that day saying he was going to move out and let you keep the apartment.

you were currently drinking various alcoholic drinks trying to get rid of the pain and memories that the two of you shared. but at the same time you didn't want to forget, he was the sweetest part of your life. the best part. you didn't wanna let him go at least not at this moment, wishing he'd come back to hold you and tell you that this was some sick joke but you knew better. the two of you were over for good.

reminiscing about all of the good times the two of you shared. your first kiss, meeting each other, helping Clay program plug ins for hours on end, stealing kisses from him as he filmed videos, wearing his sweatshirt, him surprising you with tickets to disney world, and your favorite thing cuddling.

"I can see it coming around full circle, my friend."

holding onto his sweatshirt pressing it to your chest trying to replicate the feeling of his arms around you. you slowly started to fall asleep. your eyes sore from crying all day. you knew that you'd be alright someday but that day was not today.

588 words
i had this idea as i was about to go to sleep. this is one of my favorite songs. i actually really really like this oneshot it's probably my favorite i've ever written. 

this is also very different from what i normally write, let me know if you guys like it and if i should write more like this. <3

written: 9.24.20