The Cursed Guardian

Chapter 8

~ Auryn ~

I've been here for a month and everyone is very kind of me. They are so approachable and friendly. At first I was very uncomfortable  because I was used to being bullied. My life before is very different here, now.

And it's been a month since then. There are times when I just wanted to be alone, thinking of my happy days with my family. We used to have picnic in the woods. Mom cooks barbeque and Dad cooks his famous roasted chicken. While Grandma, my sister and I prepares the picnic cloth. But it will not happen again.

"'You ready for your training?"

Raeco broke my moment of silence. Upon hearing the word training I sighed heavily. He trained me everyday to awaken my Spirit Guardian. That is what he said but I don't feel any kind awakening in my body.

Oh, there is! Body pain! He let me do some stretching then run, do monkey bars, climb a rope, crawl on a mud with a spiky wire, run through tires,  jump from a tree and he expect me to land gracefully!!!!

Seriously!!!!!!!

"Can we rest for today? My whole body is aching!"

He just laughed and sat beside me under this big oak tree. 

"I know you needed a break."

I was relieved upon hearing his words. He turned to me smiling. I smiled too. Then silence takes over.

"Ahm, I've been wanting to ask you this, but" he stopped, sensing my reaction, "you know, you can  tell me anything. I'm willing to listen whenever your ready."

Yeah, I have bottled up all my emotions since I lost my family. Training helps me to pushed it back on my head but it pops up when I was alone with silence. I really wanted to talk to someone but I don't like to bother them with my sentiments. They have their own to deal with.

"I know we did not give you time to cope with what happened to your family. As your leader, I'm sorry I did not consider your feelings."

"It's hard, actually." Maybe I can start spilling my emotions? I pick some grass and dissect it. "There are times I ask myself why I am the one who survived? Why I am alive?" I shrug. "Well, things like that."

"You know, there is a reason for everything that happens in our life." He smiled gently. "Maybe they let you run because they know you are special. You're a Guardian."

"But I run away leaving them dead." I looked up the sky, my tears are signalling to flow down my cheeks. "If I am just brave enough, strong enough, I might save them."

"It is not your fault that you run. They let you run to survive. They want you to live. You should live your life. Not live in your misery."

Yeah, he's right but how can I forget what happened? Every time I close my eyes I can see their dead bodies. I hear mom's cry and grandma gasping for air. I wiped the tears away. At least I am not crying now like a baby.

"Don't think of yourself as a coward." I am thankful he is not facing me right now. I don't want anyone to see me drowning in my insanity. "You save a village, remember?"

"But it is now desolate. I destroyed their homes." The Academy provided them a safe land to start their life again under the protection of Guardians since their village is not habitable anymore. "And I manage to save them, why I did not save my family?"

If I have extraordinary ability, why it did not appear when my family needed it the most? I failed to save them. Such an irony.

"Because it was not meant to happen?"