I didn't mean to break you (clexa au)

t h i r t y n i n e

"Clarke please, come back I still love you, come back I still need you-" Lexa's voice trailed off as she squeezed her eyes shut tightly, squeezing down on Clarke's hand.

She could've sworn she felt a squeeze back. Lexa's eyes shot open and glued onto their intertwined hands. "Clarke.. Clarke are you there?"Lexa's voice broke as she asked the question, a hint of hope laced in her voice. Nothing. Just stillness.

"Clarke baby, I need you to show me a sign. Prove to me I'm not crazy. Please." The brunette was begging. Slowly she attempted to slip her hand out of the blondes but she was stopped. Clarke's hand had gripped on to Lexa's pinky finger as she went to retrieve it. "Doctor!" Lexa yelled at the top of her lungs as she rung the help bell by Clarke's bed. "Breathe for me baby, in and out, I've got you, your going to be okay."

Doctors and nurses began to flood the room, pulling Lexa outside as the girl struggled, kicked and screamed, tears streaming down her face. "Let me in, I have to see her!" The brunette screamed as they shut and locked the door behind her. "I've been waiting two and a half years-" once again Lexa fell to the floor surrounding herself in a pool of puddles, "please," she croaked out hoping someone would accept her pleas and let her in, but they didn't.

After what seemed like hours a doctor finally came out, eyeing Lexa carefully. "She's awake, in a little shock about the fact it's been over two years. She asked if you were still around and I didn't answer. I thought after all this time it should be you that tells her what you've done for her." Lexa nodded silently as the doctor walked away.

Lexa's POV

I stepped into the over familiar room, my eyes searching for a place to look, anywhere but directly at Clarke. "Lexa?" A sore and croaked voice came from the bed. The sound of her voice after two years sent chills down my spine. I slowly edged closer and sat on the chair, my eyes still glued to the floor. "Lexa... I know it's been two years, it's okay if you've moved on, will you please just look at me? One more time?" Clarke's voice was laced with desperation and a tinge of sadness.

Gulping I slowly raised my head, our eyes meeting. I'd truly forgotten how deeply I could get lost in the blue of Clarke's eyes, but seeing those eyes I never thought I'd see again made feelings erupt from my heart. "Clarke-" I stumbled over my words, our eyes still locked. I was hoping she could still read my forest green eyes. It used to be a way of us telling each other how we were feeling without speaking. I took another deep breathe as I felt Clarke's fingers slip on top of my hand.

"Lex, it's okay, I understand," her voice was gentle and sorrowful, "I've been gone for-" I stopped her before she could say anything else.

"Marry me," I blurted out. Clarke's uneasy expression changed into pure shock as she stuttered, "what.."

"Marry me Clarke. We've wasted enough time. Two years without you, I don't want a single second without you again, ever. Marry me, Clarke Griffin because I'm still as madly in love with you as ever." Somehow I'd built some kind of confidence, which was unexpected. At first I was shocked at myself for blurring the two words out, but then I realised it was right. Clarke's eyes were filled to the brim with tears and she looked down, sliding her hand off of mine.

"Clarke-" I was scared now, she just sat there crying, the only sounds being her whimpers. "You still love me?" Clarke questioned with doubt. I nodded frantically grabbing her hand in mine, using my other hand to lift her chin up so she was looking at me. I tucked a piece of stay hair behind her ear as our eyes met again. "I will always love you, so Clarke Griffin, will you marry me?" This was the third time I'd said it, but now it was phrased as a real question. This wasn't the perfect proposal I'd wanted to give the girl of my dreams, but in the moment everything felt right, and I knew I couldn't chance losing her again. My hand glided over her hot cheek as I wiped the tears away. She nodded frantically.

"Yes Lexa Woods, I will marry you."

With that I stood up so I was above the girl I loved who still lay back on her bed. Using both my hands I cupped her beautiful face, gently leaning down till our lips were touching.

Two years. Two and a half years without kissing her plump like pillow lips. Two and a half years without my heart erupting, my belly swirling with butterflies. Two and a half years without the love of my life. Never again. Not even for one minute. Never again.

After another week in hospital Clarke was allowed to leave. Anya had moved in with her girlfriend and let Lexa and Clarke have the apartment for themselves. Lexa spent her days looking after Clarke and going to work part time. She also took Clarke for a beautiful candle lit meal in the old tree house where she first realise she felt for the girl. That night proposed again, properly, with a beautiful diamond ring while their song played in the background, it was the perfect night.