The Other One(STOPPED WRITING)

Chapter 28: Nightmares, again..

"Wipe her." I hear.
My heart beats heavily out of my chest.
I feel it might burst.
They push something in my mouth.
I didn't like this.
A machine attaches to the temples of my head as it turns on.
My screams are all muffled.
In seconds, I can't remember anything that happened 2 seconds ago.
What happened?
Where am I?
How did I get here?
What's going on?
They begin pulling out guns. The people.
Who are they?
One of them comes up to me.
What the hell was going on?
They begin dragging me into another room.
My head throbbed with pain.
They push me into some sort of icy tube thing.
I didn't want to die, if that's what was happening.
I didn't know.
And then... I felt nothing.
It's like I'm dreaming.

I gasp, waking up in a sweat.
I forgot where I was.
I begin squirming around in effort to get up, worried I'm still there.
"Shh, hey, Sarah, shh. It's okay." I hear.
I take a deep, shaky breath.
Bucky.
I remember where I was.
I begin to cry. I couldn't take these anymore.
The more I remembered, the more I wanted to forget.
Bucky begins hugging me from the back, still sitting on the floor.
I almost forgot his hand was stuck to my arm.
He tries to get me to calm down.
"You'll be okay. It was just a dream." He whispers.
I couldn't stop crying.
I felt weak.
He begins rocking me back and forth from behind, trying to get me calm again.
No offense, Buck, but that's not going to help.
My breathing was still heavy.
"Do you need some water?" He asks, whispering.
He didn't want anybody else to wake up.
He knew it would humiliate me if anybody saw me like this.
I didn't mind if Thor or Peter saw me like this.
They already had.
But I didn't want them to wake up because of me.
He gets up, lifting me up.
My legs were shaky, since I was so afraid.
I think he forgot how he was going to get a glass of water with one hand.
He walks me over to the kitchen and opens the fridge.
He grabs a bottle of water since he couldn't really pour a glass.
He places it on the counter, and tries twisting the cap open with one hand.
Surprisingly, he does.
He dumps a bit of the water out, knowing my hands were shaky and I'd probably spill it if it were filled to the top.
He hands it to me.
My hands continues to shake as I take a sip of the icy cold water.
He motions me to go sit back down.
It was really hard to sit down since his left hand was on my left arm.
I soon finish the water, after chugging it down.
I still hadn't calmed down.
I wasn't as panicked as before, though.
"I'm not going back to sleep." I whisper.
"I know." He whispers, hugging me.
I really needed this comfort.
"What was it about?" He asks, wearily.
I stay silent.
"Just- like... the wiping and then the freezing." I choke back tears.
He sighs, hugging me tighter.
He knew how it felt. He was the only one alive who knew how it felt.
"It's over now." He whispers.
"But it's still there." I whisper back.
"I know..."
I look outside the window. It was still dark outside.
"What time is it?" I ask him.
"I don't even know." He answers.
For a big tower, they didn't have many clocks.
My tears continue to fall down my face, just more slowly than before.
He wipes my tears with his sleeve.
"It'll be alright." He whispers.
"When?"
He stays silent.
"Eventually."
I take a deep breath, still trying to slow my breathing.
I really wanted to know if I could be helped the way he was.
Of course, they only helped him with the trigger words.
Clearly, nothing else was helped.
Nobody would be able to help us, really.
Not a therapist.
They'd need therapy after explaining everything to them.
"Did you sleep?" I ask Bucky.
"A bit." He whispers, answering.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize."
"But I woke you up."
"That's okay, Sarah. I usually wake up anyways."
"Did you dream? Of anything?"
He sighs.
"My family."
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have woken you up."
I felt so guilty. He was having a good dream with his family.
"Hey, it's alright. It's not your fault." He says, smiling a bit.
"But it is."
"But it's not. Don't be sorry."
"I'm sorry for being sorry." I chuckle a bit, still trying to get the tears to stop falling.
"You're sorry too much." He chuckles, still trying to be quiet.
"I know."
We sit silent, him hugging me still.
"So, now what?" I whisper.
I definitely wasn't going back to sleep. But then again, it was probably near 2:30am.
"Just try to calm down a bit. Then we'll figure it out." He whispers back.
It's not like we could go anywhere right now. First of all, we were stuck to each other, second of all, it was too early in the morning, and we couldn't wake anybody else up.
I turn to look out the window, sitting on the couch with him still hugging me from behind.
I was calmer now, I think. I couldn't tell.
The snow continues to fall outside.
I loved the silence when it snowed.
Especially outside.
It was always silent when it snowed, and it was beautiful. The air was always crisp and it was the best.
I try so hard to be normal. Act like nothing ever happened.
"Bucky?" I say.
"What is it?"
"Do you ever think, that if you acted like this whole thing didn't matter, then it wouldn't?"
He sits silent for a few seconds.
"Sometimes. You?"
"All the time. But, you know, it doesn't work like that." I sigh.
I always tried acting like I was fine with everything that happened, but I wasn't.
I never truly was.
"I hate to break it to you, pal, but we're both someone else's science experiment gone wrong. Of course it doesn't work like that." He whispers, trying to smile.
We sit in silence, again.
There was nothing, really, needed to be discussed.
We both stared out the window at the snow falling.
The city lights shined brightly, and with the snow, it was magnificent.
"Want to play a game?" Bucky asks.
"What kind of game can we play when we are literally stuck to each other." I chuckle.
"I don't know. We could ask each other questions." He chuckles.
"Sure, I guess. It's not like I'm going back to sleep."
"Alright. Well what's your favorite color?" He asks, chuckling a bit.
"My favorite color? Really?" I laugh.
"Yes. What is your favorite color?"
"I guess, white."
"Why?"
"I don't know, Buck. What about you?"
"Black. Or really dark grey." He answers.
"I could tell. It's kind of all you wear." I chuckle.
"Yeah, yeah. Well, what's your favorite song?" He asks.
I hadn't listened to music I like in a long time.
"I can't remember." I answer, truthfully.
I didn't remember.
"Well, if you could remember, what's your favorite memory?" He asks, wearily.
I smiled a bit. I remember one.
"I only remember one good memory." I answer.
He sits silently, waiting for me to answer.
"It was Christmas eve, and I think I was at least 9 years old. My grandparents and relatives came over to celebrate with us." I begin to explain....
Flashback..
"Sarah! Granny and Grandpa are here!" My mother yells.
I smile and start running down the stairs.
"Coming!" I yell.
I jump to the bottom of the stairs, and Grandpa lifts me up.
"Hey, kiddo. You excited for Santa to come later?" He asks, hugging me.
"Very excited," I smile, "I'm going to get ALL the presents I asked for."
"Are you now?" He chuckles, smiling at me.
"Yup. I made a VERY specific list."
"And now much was on that list, dear?" Granny asks.
"I think, like, 5 gifts." I answer.
"Well, let's hope he comes. Are you going to be in bed by 10?" She asks.
"No, I'm going to stay up and catch him!" I exclaim.
"Well, if he knows you're awake, he won't come." She smiles.
"Then, I'll sleep on the couch!" I explain.
"The couch? Who's sleeping on the couch?" Someone asks, coming through the door.
"Aunt Sherry!" I exclaim, going over to hug her.
I look down and she has gifts.
I try to peak through them.
"Now, now, Sarah. These are for later!" She says, kissing me on the cheek.
"Dinners ready!" Mom yells.
"Coming!" I yell back to her.
...
We all sit, huddled around the fire place.
"This darn fireplace, it takes forever to get started!" Mom says.
"That's alright, dear. Take a seat." Granny says to her.
Mom sits down next to Granny.
"Mommy, where's daddy?" I ask.
"Oh, dear, he said he had to be somewhere tonight." She says, smiling at me.
"On Christmas Eve?" I ask, a bit disappointed.
"Yes, dear. His work is very important, I suppose. But now, let's open gifts!" She assumes.
My frown disappears and turns into a smile.
"Which one do I open first?!" I ask, now excited.
"Here, dear, open this one." Granny says, handing me her gift.
I politely take it from her and start ripping off the wrapping paper.
I open it to reveal a homemade sweater.
"Thanks Granny! This is great." I smile.
"That's good to hear, dear. I was hoping you'd like it." She beams.
I fold it, terribly since I don't know how to fold clothing properly, and take the other gift that Aunt Sherry was handing me.
I open the gift to reveal a cute sock monkey.
I smile.
"I'm going to name him Willie. Willie Norman Adams." I say, hugging the sock monkey.
"I'm glad you like it, dear." Aunt Sherry says.
"Thank you, guys." I smile.
"Of course, dear." Granny says.
Mom would probably give her gifts tomorrow.

We sat around the fireplace as it begin to start working.
"Finally! This old thing never works." Mom exclaims.
"Make sure it doesn't burst out into huge flames." I chuckle.
"Sarah! Don't say such things." She says, giving me a little tap on the shoulder.
"Sorry, mum."
"Oh, it's alright dear." She smiles.
I look down at Willie Norman Adams and up at granny.
"Hey, granny?" I begin.
"What is it dear?" She smiles.
"Do- do you think you can make a sweater for Willie?" I smile.
"Of course, dear. Give me a few days, though." She says, kindly.
"Thanks Granny!"
"And if Willie needs a winter hat, too, I'd be glad to make him a hat." She smile, winking.
"That's be splendid!" I exclaim.
I was so happy.
My brother looks at me, laughing.
He was 5.
"What is it, Sam?" I smile.
"Willie is ugly." He laughs.
"He is NOT." I exclaim.
"Yes he is." He laughs more.
"Maybe you're ugly." I joke.
"Sarah! Don't call your brother ugly." Mom says.
Sam laughs.
"You're still ugly." I whisper to him.
..
"Bye Granny! Bye Grandpa! Bye Aunt Sherry!" I say, waving through the door.
I make Willie wave back at Aunt Sherry.
She smiles and gives Willie a wave before getting into her car.
Mum closes the door and pushes me toward the stairs.
"Go get ready for bed, dear. It's getting late." She smiles.
"Okay!" I say, rushing up the stairs.
I head toward the bathroom to get ready for bed.
"I'll get there first!" Sam says, trying to run past me.
He was really slow.
"No you won't." I giggle.
I get to the door first.
"Ha." I laugh.
"That's not fair. You're older than me so you're faster." He frowns, crossing his arms.
"That's exactly why I got here first." I smile, heading into the bathroom.
I brush my teeth, wash my face and head to the bedroom where I slept.
Sam enters the room five minutes later.
We shared a room, and I didn't mind.
I had put my night gown on and snuggled into my bed, holding Willie.
"Goodnight, Sam." I smile, closing my eyes.
"Night, night." He says back.
End of flashback..
Bucky sits in silence while he listened to me describing my best memory.
"That seems like a beautiful memory." He finally says, once I've finished.
"It was. It's the best I got. The only one I got, really, that I remember." I smile.
I really missed them.
Of course, Granny and Grandpa had died before I turned 14, but I'd still missed them.
The worst memory I had was seeing my mother and Sam, laying dead on the ground.
And I'd never said goodbye.
"They seemed like they really loved you, a lot." He says.
"Oh, trust me, they loved me but I was an extremely irritating child." I chuckle.
"So was I." He laughs.

Bucky and I sit in silence for most of the night, him still hugging me.
He needed comfort too.
"I miss home." I finally say, thinking about the memory, over and over again.
"Me too." He whispers.
"I miss Willie, too." I chuckle.
"Of course you do,"He laughs, "Did Willie ever get his sweater and hat?" He asks.
"He did, indeed." I answer.
"Oh, God." He chuckles.
"Willie looked adorable in it. For the longest time, Willie was my only friend."
"You didn't have any friends?"
"Not really." I answer.
"How come?"
I shrug.
"Nobody liked me, I guess."
"Well, I like you." He says.
"I think if you didn't like me, you wouldn't be hugging me right now." I laugh.
"That's fair." He laughs.