The Other One(STOPPED WRITING)

Chapter 64: Hideous...

I didn't sleep. I didn't sleep one bit, not even for a minute. Every time I wanted to close my eyes and sleep, I didn't. I wanted to stop worrying about Loki, but I didn't want to stop thinking about him.
He was probably resting peacefully the whole night, and not in any pain. According to the doctor, they gave him pain killers so he'd be able to sleep just fine.
But what if he has another nightmare? What if he woke up, and nobody was there for him? What if he woke up, scared and alone?

I look over to the clock on the wall, and it was now 6:33am. I was more exhausted than I've ever been before. And it sucked.
I just wanted to be able to see him.

Thor fell asleep around 2:30am. And Steve? Well, he slept like a baby. The beeping in the hospital didn't wake him up at all. Yet the beeping is also one of the reasons I was still awake.
And I'd continue to stay awake until I saw him.
But right now, I was starving as well. My stomach growled nearly every minute.
But I had no money. I mean... maybe I could borrow some money from Steve's wallet. He wouldn't notice.. right?
I reached over to his coat pocket, and grabbed the wallet inside. I was surprised, for he didn't even wake up. I slowly open the wallet, and take out two dollars. I didn't really know how much food cost at a hospital, but it couldn't be much.
I put the wallet back in Steve's pocket, and slowly standup, and go to the front desk again. It was the same person as before, too.
"Excuse me?" I whisper.
She looks up at me and smiles, "How can I help you?"
"Do you guys have, like, a vending machine?" I ask.
"Yes, actually. Walk straight down there," she points, "And then take a left, it should be right there."
"Thanks." I smile.

I make my way down the hallway, and to the left. The silence bothered me a bit, for some reason. I didn't like silence. But I also didn't like the beeping. The fast beeps, and then the beeps that progressively slowed down into nothing but a long, devastating, beep.
Death happened all around here.
And it bothered me so much.
But I tried not to think about it too much.

I find the vending machine, and there was only one option, really. Tandy cakes.
I put in the two dollars, and get two packs, since they were one dollar each.
I grab them and head back to my seat, quickly.

The sun was already beginning to rise, and it was a pretty sunrise, but I couldn't really see much of it. Plus, the hospital kind of ruined the peace of a sunrise.

As I made my way back to my seat, someone tapped my shoulder. Not expecting it, I flinch, and turn around quickly. I made sure not to hit the person, though.
It was the same doctor from before, that updated us about Loki.
"Sorry, didn't mean to startle ya. I just wanted to let you know that Loki is awake now, so if you want to see him, you can." He says.
And I nearly drop my Tandy cakes.
"Yeah. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I'd love to see him." I smile.
"Then follow me." He says, leading me down different hallways.
He points directly to the end of the hall, "He's in that room, right there."
"Thanks." I say, making my way to the end of the hall, as he went off to help a patient.
I was going to just walk in, but decided it'd be better to knock first, to let him now somebody was coming inside.
So I knocked.
...
Loki's POV...
I begin to wake up, as the sunrise glares through the window.
I open my eyes, expecting to see somebody. But nobody was there. Not a single person.
The room was quite nice, I suppose, but there were needles, wires, and tube things everywhere.
There was even a weird tube-looking thing with a needle in my arm. It connected to something by my side. But I didn't feel any pain from it. Actually, I didn't feel any pain at all. What kind of sorcery is this?
And suddenly, the door opens. And it was a doctor. I didn't like doctors, even if they helped people. I don't understand why I don't like them, though.
"Glad to see you're awake. How are you feeling?" The doctor asks.
But I don't answer. I didn't really want to.
"Okay. Good, I assume," He mutters, "Your surgery went well, but you may have to stay for a while. You need time to heal."
And all I do is nod.
"Oh, and, we gave you pain killers. That's why you don't feel much pain."
Pain killers?
He could see my confusion, I believe.
"It's medicine." He explains.
Oh. That makes sense.
"Well, I'll be back to check on you later. Just hit that button if you need anything." He says, pointing toward a button on the side table. And then he leaves, closing the door behind him.

I let out a sigh of relief, as he leaves. Doctors made me feel anxious for some odd reason. It was strange.

Once again, I look down at myself. The wound seemed to be stitched up in some sort of way. So, I shouldn't move much. It looks like these can tear.
And then, I look at my arms again. I already knew there were needle things on them, but they were still blue. And I couldn't change myself back to normal. I stayed in my frost giant form the whole night. Why? Why couldn't I just look normal?
Where the doctors afraid? Is that why they kept pointing, instead of taking a step near me?
I am hideous.
I knew it.
And I was too weak to look normal. I'd have to wait until I healed more.
Maybe nobody else would come in. Maybe I would heal quickly enough for nobody to see me like this.

But soon, there was a knock on the door. It surely couldn't be a doctor, he just left?
The door opens, and it's her. It's Sarah.
Normally I'd be happy to see her, but like this? I couldn't let her see me this way.
As soon as she walks in, I grab the sheets that lay on me, and pull them over me, trying to cover myself.
"Loki?" She questions.
She'd be afraid. She wouldn't like what she had to see. So, she wouldn't get to see it.
"What are you doing?" She asks, a bit concerned.
"Nothing." I answer, trying not to sound worried. But it came out in a worried tone.
It was good to hear her voice again, though.
"Take the sheets off your face." She chuckles.
I wanted to. I did.
But I couldn't. Not like this.
"I can't." I tell her.
I hear her walk closer to me, and stand beside the side of the hospital bed.
But she didn't touch the sheets. She just stood there.
"What's the matter? Why can't I look at you without a sheet over your head?"
"Because." I answer.
It wasn't exactly an answer, but I didn't want to tell her.
"Because why?" She asks.
I didn't want to answer that question. I didn't want her to see me. If I ever thought there was a chance at her ever loving me, she surely wouldn't after seeing me like this. She'd be horrified. She'd run away from me.
"You won't like what you see." I finally answer.
"Why?"
"Because." I answer, and leave it at that.
I hear her sigh, but she didn't move. She didn't leave.
"Loki," she begins, "It's okay. You could take the sheet off of your head."
But I couldn't. She wouldn't love me, or like me. She'd look at me in disgust.
"I can't." I say.
"Please?" She asks.
I didn't want to. I really didn't. But what choice did I have?
So, preparing for the worst, I slowly take the sheet off of my head. I can't even look at her. What would she think? Her facial expression would say it all, if I looked.
And she didn't even say anything. She was probably frozen in fear. I shouldn't have taken the sheet off of my head.
"Can you say something?" I whisper, continuing to stare down at the ground, on the other side of the bed.
"Why did you try to hide it?" She asks.
Because it's hideous.
"It's hideous.." I answer, quietly.
I couldn't bring myself to look at her.
"Loki, look at me." She demands, softly.
But I couldn't. My eyes were tearing up again, I was horrified. She wouldn't like me. She wouldn't like me with bluish skin and red eyes.
But then, suddenly, she puts her hand on my face, turning my head to face her.
But I couldn't look her in the eye.
She'd have a hideous frost giant staring back at her.
"Hey, look at me." She says, again.
And I have no choice but to look into her eyes. There was nothing wrong with her eyes, they were beautiful. Mine weren't.
"It's hideous, I know.." I begin, but she cuts me off.
"No, absolutely not. You are not hideous." She says.
What?
"But I am..." I whisper.
"Stop, don't say that. Okay? Listen to me, it's not hideous. It's beautifully different." She smiles.
How could she look into my eyes and smile?
How could she think it isn't hideous?
How did she think this was beautiful?
And there the tears came rolling down my face. I couldn't help it. Nobody's ever said it before. Anybody else would look at me in fear or disgust.
But she looked at me like it was art. Like I was art.
Why?
I didn't even look normal. The first thing she sees of me, after I get shot and put in the back of an ambulance, is a cold, blue, monster.
But she didn't mind?
"You really think so?" I whisper.
And she nods. She nods smiling.
"But why?" I ask her.
She smiles, and looks at me in the eye, "Because you'll always be perfect to me, no matter what, Loki."
She wipes away the tears streaming down my face with her thumb. I'm perfect? To her?
I didn't even know what to say. All I could do is smile.