The Other One(STOPPED WRITING)

Chapter 19: Thanks, Stark...

Nepenthe.
Something that can make you forget grief or suffering.
Peter was my nepenthe for now.
Whenever I was with him, I didn't think about my past much. He gave me comfort. He made me feel cared for. Even if I did just meet him a few days ago.
A few days was all a person needed.

"Are you bored?" Peter asks.
I shrug. We hadn't done anything besides eat pizza.
"W-well do you maybe want to go to the roof?" He asks.
"We can do that?" I ask, smiling.
He shrugs.
"I mean- I don't see why not." He smiles.
I wince, sitting up. My chest still hurt but I didn't want to stop myself from doing anything.
"Or, if you're not up to it..." he starts.
"I'm okay. We could go."
"O-okay. Do you need any help getting up?"
I nod. My body ached.
I put an arm around his shoulder as he helps me up.
"How are we going to get to the roof?"
"Through the perfectly good door." I laugh.
"No- but I mean," he laughs, "Without getting caught."
I hadn't thought about that. It was 6pm and mainly everybody was always with each other. Near the elevator, sitting down somewhere.
"Here, wait. Invisibility." I say.
"Sarah- I- I don't have invisibility powers." He chuckles.
"If you're touching me you will."
"Really!? Oh- wow. That's cool."
I go invisible, making him go invisible too.
"Did it work?" He asks.
"Yeah, but it's not going to do much for us if you're talking the whole time." I joke.
"Oh- yeah right, sorry." He chuckles.
"Shh."
"Sorry." He chuckles again.
He was not good at hiding.
We slowly open the door and close it. With the flick of my hand, the door locks.
We creep past the dining area where everybody sat.
They had dinner with each other tonight.
Peter missed dinner to have pizza with me.

Bucky looked up from the table and looked right over to us.
He couldn't have seen us. But then again, he always knew when I was actually there.
"Barnes, you good? Or are you losing it again?" Stark says, sarcastically.
He didn't sound that sarcastic.
Bucky turns back over to Stark and nods.
We head over to the elevator, when I remember. They'd see the elevator door open.
I lead Peter toward stairs instead.
Bucky looks back over at us.
"Gosh, Barnes what are you constantly looking at." Tony asks.
"Nothing.." Bucky answers.
The way he treated Bucky infuriated me. Yeah, sure, he killed his parents. But he never wanted to. He felt so much guilt.
Suddenly, Stark asks, "Someone go check on Peter, he's usually here."
Bucky gets up to check, winking toward our way.
We wait to see what he'd say.

He comes back and sits down.
"Well?" Tony asks.
"He's with Sarah." He replies.
Tony rolls his eyes.
What? Did he not like me? Well, I knew that answer. He didn't.
"What's the matter, Tony?" Clint asks.
"That kid is a bad influence on Peter. She'll end up getting him in trouble. Maybe even hurt him." He says, sipping his glass of wine.
Fuck you Stark. You're so obnoxious.
I watched as Bucky gripped the chair handle, angry.
Nobody said a word.
"We said we'd help her, Tony." Nat chimes in.
"She's using us!" Tony claims.
"How so?" Steve asks.
"She barely ever talks and she's always in the room."
"She's hurt, Tony!" Steve starts.
"Everybody gets hurt. Shrug it off." He says, easily.
"God, Tony, you've got to stop."
"Stop what?"
"This. You're always finding a way to talk down about her."
"Why shouldn't I? She's like Barnes. Who knows who she'll kill."
Bucky is infuriated.
Did he really just say that next to him?
"Leave Buck out of this." Steve says.
"Whatever. If we didn't save her ass, she'd be dead. Maybe we shouldn't have saved her. I told you already, she's nothing but a monster that kills. Worth nothing."
I couldn't take this anymore.
Bucky looks over to me. He knows we were there. He knows we were still listening.
"And for crying out loud, Barnes, what are you looking at...."
I couldn't do this.
I reveal myself, which reveals Peter.
Everybody is already looking over as we reveal our selves.
There were tears in my eyes, and I was ashamed.
I didn't want to cry.
I didn't want to cry because what he said, I know was true. I constantly knew.
"Great, she's an eavesdropper, too." Tony says, coldly.
I really wanted to give him a hug.
With my arm.
Metal arm.
Around the neck.
And squeeze him tight.
"This wasn't exactly a private conversation..."Thor eventually chimes.
Nat elbows him in the stomach.
"Oh- sorry." He whispers.
"You're a bitch." I address toward Stark.
I start to walk up the stairs, Peter following me.
"Kid. Get down here." Stark yells back at Peter.
"Mr. Stark..."
"What, kid?"
"I- I usually look up to you."
"What's your point kid?"
"I don't know about right now...." he mutters, nervously, following me back up the stairs.
"Peter." He yells.
He ignores him.
Wow.
I rub my eyes, trying to let the tears leave.
I felt like a loser.
I felt hated.
Maybe I am a monster.
Maybe I am a murderer.
I didn't want to be. I never did.