The Other One(STOPPED WRITING)

Chapter 72: You dont love yourself...

Loki's POV...
I believe it was around 7:30am when I woke up. I didn't realize how I woke up, until I looked over to Sarah. She was rolling around a lot, and muttering too. Perhaps she was having a nightmare.
When would she wake up from it?
It must've been terrible, like it usually is. I wanted to wake her, so she wouldn't have to live through something awful again. But, I was still in pain from the wound. Perhaps, though, I could get up. Just for the slightest bit of time.
I slowly stand up, holding the sides of the bed, making my way over to hers. But just as I got to the side of her bed, she woke up.
She looked somewhat terrified and confused.
"Are you alright?" I ask, clenching the side of the bed to keep myself up.
She looked over to me, "Yeah. Yeah I- I think I remember what happened. Or, I don't. I don't know if it's real or not."
Oh dear.
They're usually right.
"Loki, I did say something, didn't I? And you said something too?" She asks.
Her dream is correct.
I knew, eventually, that she'd remember. I just didn't think it'd be this soon.
I don't understand why I'm so terrified to tell her what she and I said. But I am.
"What happened when I wasn't in control, Loki?" She asks.
I try my best not to look into her eyes, it'd make me feel guilty for lying to her. I did not enjoy lying to her one bit.
"You were choking me." I answer, simply.
Maybe she wouldn't ask anymore questions.
"Yeah, I kind of figured. But what did I say?"
She wasn't going to give it up, was she?
"I was telling you not to do it." I say, not really answering her question.
"Do what?" She asks.
"Hurt me." I answer.
I figured maybe now that she knew what I said, she wouldn't ask what else I said.
"But why was I hurting you, did I tell you why I was hurting you?"
I swallow, hard. I didn't want to answer it, but I didn't want to lie to her either.
"Yes." I answer.
"Then what was it?"
"You must've had the wrong person. You must've been looking for somebody else." I tell her, before I answer.
Honestly, she had to have the wrong person. She couldn't love me. Nobody could love me.
"You said..you said you had to hurt the ones you love most..." I mutter, "So, you shouldn't have been hurting me."
She looked confused, and shocked. Maybe she thought I was right, about having the wrong person. Maybe she was thinking about how foolish she was, when she was out of control. I was clearly just in the way of whoever she was looking for.
"And then, what did you say?" She asks.
I cannot tell her what I said.
I shrug, "I didn't say anything but to stop."
"But how did you get me to stop?"
She knows I'm lying.
"You just stopped." I try to convince her.
"No, I didn't. Loki, how did you get me to stop?" She asks, standing up.
What a show off, she could stand up straight.
"Please, just tell me. I don't care if you hurt me to get me to stop, I just need to know if what I saw was right."
"And what do you think you saw?" I ask her.
"Loki, you said something to get me to stop, and I need you to tell me what you said to know if it's true. Please, this is important to me."
Must I tell her the truth?
"I said nothing." I lie.
Why couldn't I just tell her?
"Stop it, please. Stop lying to me. I know you said something, what was it?"
"It was nothing important."
I couldn't tell her.
"Loki, just tell me! It's just a few words, what was it?"
"Nothing."
"Tell me!" She says, loudly. She looked desperate to know, but I was a bit shocked she started shouting.
"Fine! Fine, I did say something. I told you that I love you, because I might actually! And I hate every moment of it because I know I'm not worthy of any sort of love, especially not yours!" I shout back.
Why did I admit that? She'll surely never speak to me again.
I sit down on the bed, for it was getting to painful to stand for the amount of time I was.
"Is that what you wanted to hear?" I ask, now annoyed at her, but me.
I caused such a scene just because I didn't want to admit it.
"I-um. I need some air." She says, leaving the room.
I've ruined everything. I've managed to ruin every little thing in the span of less than 10 minutes. What is wrong with me? She could probably run and never come back, and I would expect it.
She has to live with the fact, now, that somebody as horrifying as me loves her. Honestly, how did I let this happen? I don't deserve anybody's love, especially not hers.
Why did I think she could love me back?
...
Sarah's POV...
I don't know why I left him without saying anything. I should've said something, but I have no idea what to say. I need to talk to someone about this. Definitely not Steve, he'll say "I told you so" or some shit like that.
I just don't know what to say to him. He just told me he fucking loved me. Why does he love me?