The Other One(STOPPED WRITING)

Chapter 74: Strangers...

It's so cold, and I'm so exhausted. I have to lay down somewhere, but I don't have any money. I just got up and left with nothing. I mean, there's a nice curb...
That's it, though. A curb. I have to sleep on a curb. Honestly, did this guy think I was going to walk without taking a rest?
Maybe he can hear my thoughts?
I'm resting on the sidewalk, and don't stop me, I think.
I wait for some sort of response.
You get 5 minutes. I hear.
Great, how generous.
I look around, to my left and right. Nobody was in sight. Once in a while, I'd see a couple cars pass by, but that was all.
I collapse down onto the sidewalk, my legs basically giving out from walking so long. I lean against the curb, and hold my legs close to my chest. I probably wouldn't fall asleep, but it was enough if I just got to rest my eyes.
God, it's so cold. I know I should be used to getting treated like shit, still, but I'm not. I've gotten too used to comfort. But my father doesn't have to worry about they, right? He'll just wipe my memories again, and I'll be his perfect soldier.
Yay, how fun.

I look down at the ring I still had on my finger, that I bought, but Loki have to me. It pained me to leave him alone. He has nobody. Sure, he's got his brother. But how much does he truly understand him? Nobody understand anything about him. I was the only one.
And then I started to wonder..
Loki had the tesseract, so what if he came looking for me? I don't exactly know how the tesseract works, but I guess it takes you anywhere. But then again, he has no idea where I am, so maybe he can't.
As much as I didn't want him to find me, I did. I wanted him to find another way so that I didn't have to go back to where it all started.
I wanted him to find a way, so that I didn't have to forget about him.
God, that's gonna hurt.
Forgetting.
Forgetting would be the worst pain, rather than the machine that makes me forget.
I have to forget everything I've experienced. I have to forget what I remembered, from so long ago. I won't remember anybody or anything. I'd be told what I was, rather than knowing what I was.
God, I'm going to forget about Loki. I can't forget about him. That's going to hurt so much. I'd finally felt some sort of freedom, and Loki helped me feel that. And now the worst possible scenario is happening. I'm going to forget everything.
Meeting him for the first time, when he was locked away.
Him saving me, and acting all heroic.
Him hiding away in my closet, trying not to give anything away.
Him helping me remember some things.
Him showing me the stars at 3am.
The first time we got Starbucks, and he acted like a kid in a candy shop.
The first time we went to the mall together, and he insisted on buying a snake plush, and this cheap ring.
Our time together in the cabin.
How free we both felt when we rode that motorcycle.
Him being the king of the cabin, me overthrowing him on the stupid snow throne, and he overthrowing me.
When he got eyeliner stuck to his face, and he looked like a cat.
When he sort of poisoned my tea to get me to fall back to sleep again, because he knew I wouldn't fall asleep after a nightmare.
When he really didn't want to try hot chocolate, because he thought everything was poisonous.
Him comforting me after a nightmare.
His hugs.
His voice.
Him saving my life, twice.
When he stayed with me the entire time I was in a coma.
When I found out we'd met so many years beforehand, and didn't even know it.
When he was scared to show himself as a frost giant, but eventually did, because I'd never judge him.
And finally, falling in love with him.
I'd forget every little thing about him that I just.. I just loved.
God, I'm going to miss him so much. Even if I don't remember missing him.
And now, adding the the freezing cold and exhaustion, I was crying.
I wasn't gonna remember him at all.
And if he ever found me... I wouldn't know who he was. He'd be stuck with memories that I'd never remember. Or it would take a long time to remember, at least.
Times up, get up and start walking.
God, damnit.
I stand up, and start walking in the same direction again.
I wanted to walk as slow as possible, but that would just add to the extra amount of pain.
If I took longer, I had more time to think about how much I'd miss everything I had.
Even if it wasn't a lot, it was enough for me. All I'd ever wanted was enough. Nothing more.
I wanted a life.
And my fucked up father wanted me to think I was going to get one. And then he wanted to rip everything I ever wanted away from me.

I continued down the crooked sidewalk, looking for where to turn next. Every now and then, he'd get in my head again, and tell me where to go. But how did he even know where I was? Could he see what I see or something? Who knows? He probably could.
Hide.
I hear him tell me.
Why? Why did I have to hide?
Hide and be quiet, or I'll make you.
Not much of a choice, really. I creep into an alley, and hide behind a bunch of trash cans. It smelled like shit, but at least I wasn't losing control.
"Hello?" I hear someone yell.
And now I get it.
I get why my father wanted me to hide.
Can this torture of his get any worse?
The person yelling was Loki.
I guess he can truly go anywhere he wanted, as long as he knew what the place looked like.
He must've known I couldn't get too far. He must've been down these streets before.
"I know you're here!" He shouts.
It's so hard keeping myself together, and right now I'm crumbling. Tears slowly stream down my face, as I try not to make a sound.
I couldn't let him find me. If he did, my father would say the goddamn words because he'd be in my way of getting back to him.
"Please, come out. We could figure something out, Sarah."
I held my breath as he neared the alley.
I'd close my eyes, and not look at him, if he came my way.
If my father can truly see what I see, he'd see Loki, and I'd be forced to kill him.
But if he didn't see him, I wouldn't.
He can't hear what I say, only what I think.
"I know you're hiding." He says, his voice sounding as though he'd been shouting a lot.
And quickly, as I hear him getting closer to me, I close my eyes, and look down.
And suddenly, I can't feel his presence. He was right in front of me.
I wanted to see him, just see a glance of him.
But I know I can't.
I could tell he bends down to try and face me.
"Look at me?" He asks.
I shake my head, no, "I can't."
"Please, come back with me."
"I don't want to kill you. Please, go."
Why did he have to come find me? I told him not to do that.
"We can figure out a way." He says, and I could tell he's holding back tears. His voice always changed a bit when he was crying, or trying not to.
"There isn't another way. Either way, I lose control, and kill you." I whisper.
"Please?" He says, finally.
Usually I would have done what he asked by now. Especially when he was so desperate, but this time was different. If I do what he's asking, a lot of people are going to die.
"I can't." I choke out, through the tears.
He puts his hand on my shoulder, and he wants to give me a hug. But if I stayed here any longer, my father would probably just started saying those words.
He sighs, and I feel a tear drop fall on my arm. He was crying, too.
And I felt so guilty.
"We'll meet again. I mean, I don't know where nor when. But we'll meet again someday." I whisper.
"But as what? Strangers?" He asks.
"Perhaps. But strangers never stay strangers. Take a look at what we became. We started off as strangers." I say.
He stays silent for a few moments, as do I.
"Then I suppose I'm saying goodbye, now." Loki says.
And I nod, trying not to cry more than I already was.
"Goodbye." He says.
And slowly, his hand leaves my shoulder.
He stands up, and I know he's holding the tesseract, because I can see the blue light, even with closed eyes.
And just like that, the light is gone.
I open my eyes, and reach out my hand to where he recently stood.
"Goodbye." I whisper, as tears slowly fall down my face.
I didn't want to say goodbye twice.
But we did.
And now I have to stand back up, and keep going.
Isn't it sad? You'll be strangers again. He'll know everything about you, that even you don't know about yourself. He says it sarcastically, not sad at all.
Wow, he's so good at cheering people up.
Where do I go now, I think?
You think your going back to New York? Oh, dear, no. No, you're not going to New York. Everybody already knows where that is. We're going to make it a challenge for them. They have to find you.
And where am I going?
Just keep going straight forward. And stop crying, you look like a baby.
Great. Any chance I had at being saved, was gone. It'd take them forever to find this new place I was heading to.
Why is he even doing this? What's the point?
Why can't he use somebody else?
I know.
That's so terrible of me to even ask. I'm so greedy, aren't I? I'd give up my spot in Hydra any day, for somebody else to go through it. And that's so disgusting of me. Nobody should have to go through it. I'd just have to be the one to go through it.
Even if I didn't want to be.